Child Behavior - manipulation, lying and fire

[Guest guest]

Can anyone help me? My 11 y.o. son is very focused on fire. He even says he

doesn't know why. He is also quite convincing when he is focused on getting his

way. He has lied to several neighbors recently in an effort to obtain matches

from them. today, I gave him an opportunity to purchase something in the store

while I watched from a distance. When we got in the car, I asked for the change.

It didnt' add up. Then he said he had to go to the bathroom. I got suspicious

and made him empty his pockets. He had purchased a lighter at the counter!

I dont' know why people would give a child matches or a lighter! It is beyond

me, but he says he is a boyscout and they believe him or that his dad needs to

light the grill, etc.

1) What should I do about this? Consequences ar ineffective. It is like an

obsession.

2) Should I email our neighbors on the neighborhood link and warn them about my

son? Won't that only make him feared and us ostrasized? The general public

doesn't understand aspergers.

3) How do I handle the fire issue and the lying? Are they separate issues?

Thanks,

Miriam