Re: Everybody got their intro letters in?

[Guest guest]

Could someone post one of their letters? Take your child's name out, but I want

to see one so if I can see if I'm on the right track. I'd appreciate it and

maybe other could be helped, too?

Thanks!!

[Guest guest]

>

> Could someone post one of their letters? Take your child's name out, but I

want to see one so if I can see if I'm on the right track. I'd appreciate it and

maybe other could be helped, too?

Following is my son's. He is 14yo, incoming 9th grader with IEP for

organization and social skills. The formatting is not going to come out on the

listserv, so please have patience with that.

The letter is nothing great, but teachers seem to appreciate it. Before I

started doing this several years ago, teachers would be caught totally off-guard

by my son and it was not pretty.

Before he had a 504 or an IEP, I would do it a little differently, since the

teachers were getting no info at all. Instead of the " Challenges which may not

be obvious " section, I had several sections: Problems other teachers have had

due to my son's disability, Solutions other teachers have found, Things that are

counterproductive, What we do at home to support school. I also included more

intro, including info from evaluations.

Remember you are going to be talking a lot to your child's teachers and

administrators all year, so you don't have to say everything and it doesn't have

to be perfect. You just don't want them to be caught off guard and get off to a

bad start.

Hope this helps!

------------------------

To the teachers of ----- -----

Hello, we are -----’ parents. We are writing this because many of -----’

teachers have commented that he “was a first†or “was a learning

experience.†Many have found ----- to be a challenge. We hope that the

following information will be helpful.

Intro

----- has been diagnosed with a type of autism called Asperger Disorder and also

Developmental Coordination Disorder. He has also been termed “emotionally

fragile†by ----- Hospital.

Strengths

• Academic

o Keen interests and skills in certain subjects

o High academic ability

o Reading and vocabulary

o Creative writing

o Science

• Learning style

o Auditory

o Group (as opposed to solitary)

o Hands-on

• Personality

o Kind and affectionate, positive attitude

o Imaginative and creative

o Good sense of humor

o Independent

Weaknesses

It is helpful to note that ----- is not typical of Asperger Disorder in some

ways. His visual-spatial processing skills are very average, while his auditory

processing skills are very high. He often prefers working on a team as opposed

to learning on his own, although he may also get very absorbed in individual

projects if he finds them very interesting.

It is important to understand -----’ weaknesses, because they come out looking

like attention problems when he in fact he is having communication breakdowns.

It is easy to mistake ----- in shutdown mode for someone simply being

well-behaved and quiet.

• Academic

o Math

o Written expression (grammar, punctuation, taking perspective)

• Social cognitive

o Using and understanding non-verbal behaviors

o Developing appropriate peer relationships

o Taking perspective

o Pragmatic language

• Executive functioning

o Organization and planning

o Working memory

o Initiation

• Processing speed

• Coordination

o Manual dexterity

o Bilateral (top and bottom) coordination

o To a lesser extent, left-right coordination

• Hypo-sensitive

o Doesn’t seek sensation (may not notice discomfort)

• Anxiety

Special Interests

• Science fiction

• Fantasy

• Creative writing in all types of forms: he has created role-playing games on

the computer, short graphic stories as well as written more traditional stories.

Many times he writes " episodes " to already existing stories, TV shows or movies,

even computer games, that he likes, and sometimes he creates his own stories.

• Creative process. ----- studies directors, listens to interviews with

actors, directors, producers, authors. He hasn’t watched a movie until he’s

seen all the extra interviews available on the DVD, looks people up on the

internet, etc.

• Extreme weather, clouds

• Certain details of history may catch -----’ eye, usually to do with some

sort of extremeness. For example, he may decide he wants to learn about and

memorize all the names and ranks of Hitler’s top 100 men when studying WWII.

• Germs and viruses

• Criminal histories

• Forensic science

Challenges that may not be obvious

Below are information on -----' challenges. Some of it is from direct

observation by ourselves, past teachers, evaluators, and some of it is quoted

material about Asperger Disorder from various sources.

• Because he uses words somewhat differently, it is especially important for

----- to learn to validate what he is trying to communicate and what other

people are trying to communicate to him. He needs to learn two-way

communication.

• When discussing the " why " of problems, speak of why something is troublesome

in non-judgmental terms rather than using words such as " should " , " should not " ,

" what would be better " . This will help ----- feel validated and listened to and

will help him be able to continue the conversation.

• Be aware that saying " no " , " stop " or other normal ways of communicating to

kids may not work with -----. He may misunderstand why you are saying these

things. Instead say " excuse me " , tap him on the shoulder and give a more

concrete explanation. He needs not only simple statements but also an

explanation of why you are saying them.

• It is hard for ----- to intercede in a conversation where he feels he has

lost control and quickly say " there was something important I wanted to say

first " . He doesn't know how to regain control of a conversation if it runs off

in a different direction. It is easier to just go into automatic

mode--responding to exact questions. This is something he is working on.

• Try binary decision-making. One of the most powerful causes for inertia is

the feeling of the Asperger’s child that some task is so vast and complex that

he can’t possibly accomplish it. To overcome this barrier, teach him how to

factor any problem into two decisions. He makes one of those decisions and then

factors the next part of the issue into two more decisions, and makes one of

these decisions until the job is done.

• Avoid asking vague questions such as, " Why did you do that? " Instead, say,

" I did not like it when you slammed your book down when I said it was time for

gym. Next time put the book down gently and tell me you are angry. Were you

showing me that you did not want to go to gym, or that you did not want to stop

reading? " Avoid asking essay-type questions. Be as concrete as possible in all

your interactions with -----.

• Although he has an occasional snafu, ----- does not have as much difficulty

with idioms, double meanings, sarcasm or nicknames as many kids with Asperger

have.

• Remember that facial expressions and other social cues may not work. Most

individuals with autism have difficulty reading facial expressions and

interpreting " body language " . One of the reasons why ----- needs to be directly

asked for his assignments is because he does not notice all the non-verbal

activity going on: teacher waiting at the front of the class, other kids moving

arms, passing papers and shifting in their chairs passing papers up, eyes

following the papers, etc.

• If ----- does not seem to be learning a task, break it down into smaller

steps or present the task in several ways (e.g., visually, verbally,

physically). He is learning to make his own task lists, but typically does not

do that on his own yet. As stated earlier, he is not terribly visual-spatial,

but he does okay with linear lists.

• Avoid verbal overload. Be clear. Use shorter sentences if you perceive that

the student is not fully understanding you. Although he probably has no hearing

problem and may be paying attention, ----- may have difficulty understanding

your main point and identifying important information. He has difficulty

following directions, both verbal and written.

• Since ----- experiences various communication difficulties, do not rely on

him to relay important messages to his parents about school events, assignments,

school rules, etc. Even sending home a note for his parents may not work. -----

may not remember to deliver the note. Phone calls or e-mails to parents work

best until the skill can be developed. ----- has a difficult time recalling

events on demand from different parts of the day. He has never been able to

answer questions like " what did you do at school today. " If a teacher does not

tell me, for the most part, I don't know. He does spontaneously remember some

things, and he has an excellent long-term memory. He remembers things forever

once he remembers. Hopefully this will improve as he gets older and keeps

working on it, but he may always need to write " everything " down.

• Going along with the previous note, ----- needs to write down more detail

for assignments and notes than is typical. If it isn't written down, it is

often as if it never happened. This includes strategies like having him

verbally repeat things in his own words. This does not usually work, that is,

he has forgotten it by the time he gets home. As said above, hopefully this

will improve as he gets older and keeps working on it, but he may always need to

write " everything " down.

• Assume nothing when assessing skills. For example, the individual with

autism may be a " math whiz " in Algebra, but not able to make simple change at a

cash register. Or, he may have an incredible memory about books he has read,

speeches he has heard or sports statistics, but still may not be able to

remember to bring a pencil to class. Uneven skills development is a hallmark of

autism. ----- IQ test subscores range from the 1st percentile to the 99th

percentile.

• -----' coordination disability causes him to sit back and let his teammates

do all the physical work when working on things like science experiments. It is

good to strike a balance, encouraging him to get some practice doing physical

activities but not so much so that he is focusing more on simple physical

movements than on learning the material.

• ----- shows anxiety or overwhelm by becoming very quiet and withdrawing from

interaction. He gives the impression of being quiet and well-behaved when he is

actually shutdown, possibly feeling very anxious. If he is not doing what he is

supposed to be doing, talk to him about what is going on. Asperger's children

tend to be very proud. If they cannot follow along in a class, they may attempt

to resolve the issue by just refusing to do the work. It’s easier to say “No

I won’t†then to say “I feel stupid not being able to do the work. Help

me! " . In ----- case, he usually simply quietly doesn't do the work, and if

asked says something casual to indicate he just didn't feel like it. He has

gotten very good at this. To my experience, he is usually having some

difficulty he doesn't feel comfortable admitting to rather than being

unmotivated. It is very important to use language that does not connote that he

missed something.

• An intensification of unusual behavior may mean escalating anxiety. For

-----, such behavior might be talking to self (thinking out loud), possibly with

anger, whole body tremoring and stiffness, dropping things and being unable to

pick them up. ----- has never " lost it " at school. If that were to happen, it

would probably be in the form of a verbal outburst. ----- is very un-physical,

and his personality is mild besides, so he has never been violent.

• Processing speed: a lot of the accommodation for this is simply encouraging

----- to relax and take his time, possibly lessening the workload. He is

getting pretty good at accommodating himself, as long as he is not rushed by

someone else or by circumstances.

Summary

----- may be a challenge sometimes, to both you and his classmates. We think

this is normal in the circumstances and expected. We hope the difficult times

will not let you lose perspective. Nothing works all the time, and sometimes

things go great and sometimes they don't. We hope you will feel free to share

with us, as we like to be able to support -----' teachers. Please remember that

we know our child well, and whatever you say will not upset us or make us think

poorly of you. Communication is key, even at -----' age, and we feel we can

only provide the best for ----- by working together. Please do not hesitate to

contact us if you have questions or think there is something we should know

about.

I will give you a little background on ourselves. Neither of us have ever been

teachers, so please don't hesitate to state the obvious. Also, ----- has not

had an IEP before (he had a 504 Plan), so please have patience with us as we

learn the system.

Thank you very much for all you do†" we are looking forward to a great year!

Sincerely,

[Guest guest]

Ruth – What parents group did you join? I know you live near

Houston so was just curious. I live in Ft. Bend county and know they have a parents’

group here though I have never attended.

From:

[mailto: ] On

Behalf Of r_woman2

Sent: Sunday, August 16, 2009 10:14 AM

Subject: ( ) Everybody got their intro letters in?

Hi all. Has everybody gotten their intro

letters into their child's teachers/school administrators? I finally finished

mine yesterday (Saturday) and sent it off. I really struggled with it. Jeff

, if you're out there, I hope you don't mind I quoted some of your

thoughts in my " Challenges which may not be obvious " section. You

really gave us some great insights a little while back there. Let me know if

you want to see it.

I also finally got around to joining the closest local Asperger's parent group

I could find. It is a couple of counties away, over an hour's drive at the time

they have meetings (weeknights, so through rush hour traffic). They have a

discussion list that I posted an intro to and got not a single reply. I

guess nobody uses it except for meeting announcements. But I enjoyed the

meeting I went to. It was great to meet live people, and there was a woman

there from our school district whose 6th grader is going to the same school my

son went to. I was able to tell her some people to talk to. It was amazing,

they are doing the exact same thing with her they did with us. She went out and

got a diagnosis herself, and they are insisting on starting with a 504. So, I

told her how we got it bumped up to an IEP. Hopefully it will save her son some

time getting into the right program. She's doing pretty good anyway, might not

have needed any help.

[Guest guest]

This is fantastic. I appreciate this so much. I think you've put so much into your letter and it shows great detail and thought. Thank you. On Tue, Aug 18, 2009 at 11:03 AM, r_woman2 <me2ruth@...> wrote:

 

>

> Could someone post one of their letters? Take your child's name out, but I want to see one so if I can see if I'm on the right track. I'd appreciate it and maybe other could be helped, too?

Following is my son's. He is 14yo, incoming 9th grader with IEP for organization and social skills. The formatting is not going to come out on the listserv, so please have patience with that.

The letter is nothing great, but teachers seem to appreciate it. Before I started doing this several years ago, teachers would be caught totally off-guard by my son and it was not pretty.

Before he had a 504 or an IEP, I would do it a little differently, since the teachers were getting no info at all. Instead of the " Challenges which may not be obvious " section, I had several sections: Problems other teachers have had due to my son's disability, Solutions other teachers have found, Things that are counterproductive, What we do at home to support school. I also included more intro, including info from evaluations.

Remember you are going to be talking a lot to your child's teachers and administrators all year, so you don't have to say everything and it doesn't have to be perfect. You just don't want them to be caught off guard and get off to a bad start.

Hope this helps!

------------------------

To the teachers of ----- -----

Hello, we are -----’ parents. We are writing this because many of -----’ teachers have commented that he “was a first†or “was a learning experience.†Many have found ----- to be a challenge. We hope that the following information will be helpful.

Intro

----- has been diagnosed with a type of autism called Asperger Disorder and also Developmental Coordination Disorder. He has also been termed “emotionally fragile†by ----- Hospital.

Strengths

• Academic

o Keen interests and skills in certain subjects

o High academic ability

o Reading and vocabulary

o Creative writing

o Science

• Learning style

o Auditory

o Group (as opposed to solitary)

o Hands-on

• Personality

o Kind and affectionate, positive attitude

o Imaginative and creative

o Good sense of humor

o Independent

Weaknesses

It is helpful to note that ----- is not typical of Asperger Disorder in some ways. His visual-spatial processing skills are very average, while his auditory processing skills are very high. He often prefers working on a team as opposed to learning on his own, although he may also get very absorbed in individual projects if he finds them very interesting.

It is important to understand -----’ weaknesses, because they come out looking like attention problems when he in fact he is having communication breakdowns.

It is easy to mistake ----- in shutdown mode for someone simply being well-behaved and quiet.

• Academic

o Math

o Written expression (grammar, punctuation, taking perspective)

• Social cognitive

o Using and understanding non-verbal behaviors

o Developing appropriate peer relationships

o Taking perspective

o Pragmatic language

• Executive functioning

o Organization and planning

o Working memory

o Initiation

• Processing speed

• Coordination

o Manual dexterity

o Bilateral (top and bottom) coordination

o To a lesser extent, left-right coordination

• Hypo-sensitive

o Doesn’t seek sensation (may not notice discomfort)

• Anxiety

Special Interests

• Science fiction

• Fantasy

• Creative writing in all types of forms: he has created role-playing games on the computer, short graphic stories as well as written more traditional stories. Many times he writes " episodes " to already existing stories, TV shows or movies, even computer games, that he likes, and sometimes he creates his own stories.

• Creative process. ----- studies directors, listens to interviews with actors, directors, producers, authors. He hasn’t watched a movie until he’s seen all the extra interviews available on the DVD, looks people up on the internet, etc.

• Extreme weather, clouds

• Certain details of history may catch -----’ eye, usually to do with some sort of extremeness. For example, he may decide he wants to learn about and memorize all the names and ranks of Hitler’s top 100 men when studying WWII.

• Germs and viruses

• Criminal histories

• Forensic science

Challenges that may not be obvious

Below are information on -----' challenges. Some of it is from direct observation by ourselves, past teachers, evaluators, and some of it is quoted material about Asperger Disorder from various sources.

• Because he uses words somewhat differently, it is especially important for ----- to learn to validate what he is trying to communicate and what other people are trying to communicate to him. He needs to learn two-way communication.

• When discussing the " why " of problems, speak of why something is troublesome in non-judgmental terms rather than using words such as " should " , " should not " , " what would be better " . This will help ----- feel validated and listened to and will help him be able to continue the conversation.

• Be aware that saying " no " , " stop " or other normal ways of communicating to kids may not work with -----. He may misunderstand why you are saying these things. Instead say " excuse me " , tap him on the shoulder and give a more concrete explanation. He needs not only simple statements but also an explanation of why you are saying them.

• It is hard for ----- to intercede in a conversation where he feels he has lost control and quickly say " there was something important I wanted to say first " . He doesn't know how to regain control of a conversation if it runs off in a different direction. It is easier to just go into automatic mode--responding to exact questions. This is something he is working on.

• Try binary decision-making. One of the most powerful causes for inertia is the feeling of the Asperger’s child that some task is so vast and complex that he can’t possibly accomplish it. To overcome this barrier, teach him how to factor any problem into two decisions. He makes one of those decisions and then factors the next part of the issue into two more decisions, and makes one of these decisions until the job is done.

• Avoid asking vague questions such as, " Why did you do that? " Instead, say, " I did not like it when you slammed your book down when I said it was time for gym. Next time put the book down gently and tell me you are angry. Were you showing me that you did not want to go to gym, or that you did not want to stop reading? " Avoid asking essay-type questions. Be as concrete as possible in all your interactions with -----.

• Although he has an occasional snafu, ----- does not have as much difficulty with idioms, double meanings, sarcasm or nicknames as many kids with Asperger have.

• Remember that facial expressions and other social cues may not work. Most individuals with autism have difficulty reading facial expressions and interpreting " body language " . One of the reasons why ----- needs to be directly asked for his assignments is because he does not notice all the non-verbal activity going on: teacher waiting at the front of the class, other kids moving arms, passing papers and shifting in their chairs passing papers up, eyes following the papers, etc.

• If ----- does not seem to be learning a task, break it down into smaller steps or present the task in several ways (e.g., visually, verbally, physically). He is learning to make his own task lists, but typically does not do that on his own yet. As stated earlier, he is not terribly visual-spatial, but he does okay with linear lists.

• Avoid verbal overload. Be clear. Use shorter sentences if you perceive that the student is not fully understanding you. Although he probably has no hearing problem and may be paying attention, ----- may have difficulty understanding your main point and identifying important information. He has difficulty following directions, both verbal and written.

• Since ----- experiences various communication difficulties, do not rely on him to relay important messages to his parents about school events, assignments, school rules, etc. Even sending home a note for his parents may not work. ----- may not remember to deliver the note. Phone calls or e-mails to parents work best until the skill can be developed. ----- has a difficult time recalling events on demand from different parts of the day. He has never been able to answer questions like " what did you do at school today. " If a teacher does not tell me, for the most part, I don't know. He does spontaneously remember some things, and he has an excellent long-term memory. He remembers things forever once he remembers. Hopefully this will improve as he gets older and keeps working on it, but he may always need to write " everything " down.

• Going along with the previous note, ----- needs to write down more detail for assignments and notes than is typical. If it isn't written down, it is often as if it never happened. This includes strategies like having him verbally repeat things in his own words. This does not usually work, that is, he has forgotten it by the time he gets home. As said above, hopefully this will improve as he gets older and keeps working on it, but he may always need to write " everything " down.

• Assume nothing when assessing skills. For example, the individual with autism may be a " math whiz " in Algebra, but not able to make simple change at a cash register. Or, he may have an incredible memory about books he has read, speeches he has heard or sports statistics, but still may not be able to remember to bring a pencil to class. Uneven skills development is a hallmark of autism. ----- IQ test subscores range from the 1st percentile to the 99th percentile.

• -----' coordination disability causes him to sit back and let his teammates do all the physical work when working on things like science experiments. It is good to strike a balance, encouraging him to get some practice doing physical activities but not so much so that he is focusing more on simple physical movements than on learning the material.

• ----- shows anxiety or overwhelm by becoming very quiet and withdrawing from interaction. He gives the impression of being quiet and well-behaved when he is actually shutdown, possibly feeling very anxious. If he is not doing what he is supposed to be doing, talk to him about what is going on. Asperger's children tend to be very proud. If they cannot follow along in a class, they may attempt to resolve the issue by just refusing to do the work. It’s easier to say “No I won’t†then to say “I feel stupid not being able to do the work. Help me! " . In ----- case, he usually simply quietly doesn't do the work, and if asked says something casual to indicate he just didn't feel like it. He has gotten very good at this. To my experience, he is usually having some difficulty he doesn't feel comfortable admitting to rather than being unmotivated. It is very important to use language that does not connote that he missed something.

• An intensification of unusual behavior may mean escalating anxiety. For -----, such behavior might be talking to self (thinking out loud), possibly with anger, whole body tremoring and stiffness, dropping things and being unable to pick them up. ----- has never " lost it " at school. If that were to happen, it would probably be in the form of a verbal outburst. ----- is very un-physical, and his personality is mild besides, so he has never been violent.

• Processing speed: a lot of the accommodation for this is simply encouraging ----- to relax and take his time, possibly lessening the workload. He is getting pretty good at accommodating himself, as long as he is not rushed by someone else or by circumstances.

Summary

----- may be a challenge sometimes, to both you and his classmates. We think this is normal in the circumstances and expected. We hope the difficult times will not let you lose perspective. Nothing works all the time, and sometimes things go great and sometimes they don't. We hope you will feel free to share with us, as we like to be able to support -----' teachers. Please remember that we know our child well, and whatever you say will not upset us or make us think poorly of you. Communication is key, even at -----' age, and we feel we can only provide the best for ----- by working together. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you have questions or think there is something we should know about.

I will give you a little background on ourselves. Neither of us have ever been teachers, so please don't hesitate to state the obvious. Also, ----- has not had an IEP before (he had a 504 Plan), so please have patience with us as we learn the system.

Thank you very much for all you do†" we are looking forward to a great year!

Sincerely,

[Guest guest]

Regarding letters.  I understand totally about writing a letter for elementary.  As for high school, should a letter be sent to every teacher my son has?  Incidentally my ds goes infor his orientation next Wed morning.  Then we and the school folks (social worker,counselor) will get together for a meeting to discuss his special ed. and exactly how much he needs.  At this point we will be getting the IEP.  Sept 1st is first day at school.  What I did find out about the school is freshman have one floor where all their classes (sans PE) so that transition is good for all.  This made me feel better to know he will have only one floor to navigate for classes. 

On Tue, Aug 18, 2009 at 10:03 AM, r_woman2 <me2ruth@...> wrote:

 

>> Could someone post one of their letters? Take your child's name out, but I want to see one so if I can see if I'm on the right track. I'd appreciate it and maybe other could be helped, too?

Following is my son's. He is 14yo, incoming 9th grader with IEP for organization and social skills. The formatting is not going to come out on the listserv, so please have patience with that. The letter is nothing great, but teachers seem to appreciate it. Before I started doing this several years ago, teachers would be caught totally off-guard by my son and it was not pretty.

Before he had a 504 or an IEP, I would do it a little differently, since the teachers were getting no info at all. Instead of the " Challenges which may not be obvious " section, I had several sections: Problems other teachers have had due to my son's disability, Solutions other teachers have found, Things that are counterproductive, What we do at home to support school. I also included more intro, including info from evaluations.

Remember you are going to be talking a lot to your child's teachers and administrators all year, so you don't have to say everything and it doesn't have to be perfect. You just don't want them to be caught off guard and get off to a bad start.

Hope this helps!------------------------To the teachers of ----- -----Hello, we are -----’ parents. We are writing this because many of -----’ teachers have commented that he “was a first†or “was a learning experience.†Many have found ----- to be a challenge. We hope that the following information will be helpful.

Intro----- has been diagnosed with a type of autism called Asperger Disorder and also Developmental Coordination Disorder. He has also been termed “emotionally fragile†by ----- Hospital. Strengths

• Academic o Keen interests and skills in certain subjects o High academic ability o Reading and vocabulary o Creative writing o Science• Learning style o Auditory o Group (as opposed to solitary)

o Hands-on• Personality o Kind and affectionate, positive attitude o Imaginative and creative o Good sense of humor o IndependentWeaknessesIt is helpful to note that ----- is not typical of Asperger Disorder in some ways. His visual-spatial processing skills are very average, while his auditory processing skills are very high. He often prefers working on a team as opposed to learning on his own, although he may also get very absorbed in individual projects if he finds them very interesting.

It is important to understand -----’ weaknesses, because they come out looking like attention problems when he in fact he is having communication breakdowns. It is easy to mistake ----- in shutdown mode for someone simply being well-behaved and quiet.

• Academic o Math o Written expression (grammar, punctuation, taking perspective)• Social cognitiveo Using and understanding non-verbal behaviors o Developing appropriate peer relationships

o Taking perspective o Pragmatic language• Executive functioning o Organization and planning o Working memory o Initiation• Processing speed • Coordination o Manual dexterity o Bilateral (top and bottom) coordination

o To a lesser extent, left-right coordination• Hypo-sensitive o Doesn’t seek sensation (may not notice discomfort)• AnxietySpecial Interests• Science fiction • Fantasy • Creative writing in all types of forms: he has created role-playing games on the computer, short graphic stories as well as written more traditional stories. Many times he writes " episodes " to already existing stories, TV shows or movies, even computer games, that he likes, and sometimes he creates his own stories.

• Creative process. ----- studies directors, listens to interviews with actors, directors, producers, authors. He hasn’t watched a movie until he’s seen all the extra interviews available on the DVD, looks people up on the internet, etc.

• Extreme weather, clouds • Certain details of history may catch -----’ eye, usually to do with some sort of extremeness. For example, he may decide he wants to learn about and memorize all the names and ranks of Hitler’s top 100 men when studying WWII.

• Germs and viruses • Criminal histories • Forensic scienceChallenges that may not be obviousBelow are information on -----' challenges. Some of it is from direct observation by ourselves, past teachers, evaluators, and some of it is quoted material about Asperger Disorder from various sources.

• Because he uses words somewhat differently, it is especially important for ----- to learn to validate what he is trying to communicate and what other people are trying to communicate to him. He needs to learn two-way communication.

• When discussing the " why " of problems, speak of why something is troublesome in non-judgmental terms rather than using words such as " should " , " should not " , " what would be better " . This will help ----- feel validated and listened to and will help him be able to continue the conversation.

• Be aware that saying " no " , " stop " or other normal ways of communicating to kids may not work with -----. He may misunderstand why you are saying these things. Instead say " excuse me " , tap him on the shoulder and give a more concrete explanation. He needs not only simple statements but also an explanation of why you are saying them.

• It is hard for ----- to intercede in a conversation where he feels he has lost control and quickly say " there was something important I wanted to say first " . He doesn't know how to regain control of a conversation if it runs off in a different direction. It is easier to just go into automatic mode--responding to exact questions. This is something he is working on.

• Try binary decision-making. One of the most powerful causes for inertia is the feeling of the Asperger’s child that some task is so vast and complex that he can’t possibly accomplish it. To overcome this barrier, teach him how to factor any problem into two decisions. He makes one of those decisions and then factors the next part of the issue into two more decisions, and makes one of these decisions until the job is done.

• Avoid asking vague questions such as, " Why did you do that? " Instead, say, " I did not like it when you slammed your book down when I said it was time for gym. Next time put the book down gently and tell me you are angry. Were you showing me that you did not want to go to gym, or that you did not want to stop reading? " Avoid asking essay-type questions. Be as concrete as possible in all your interactions with -----.

• Although he has an occasional snafu, ----- does not have as much difficulty with idioms, double meanings, sarcasm or nicknames as many kids with Asperger have. • Remember that facial expressions and other social cues may not work. Most individuals with autism have difficulty reading facial expressions and interpreting " body language " . One of the reasons why ----- needs to be directly asked for his assignments is because he does not notice all the non-verbal activity going on: teacher waiting at the front of the class, other kids moving arms, passing papers and shifting in their chairs passing papers up, eyes following the papers, etc.

• If ----- does not seem to be learning a task, break it down into smaller steps or present the task in several ways (e.g., visually, verbally, physically). He is learning to make his own task lists, but typically does not do that on his own yet. As stated earlier, he is not terribly visual-spatial, but he does okay with linear lists.

• Avoid verbal overload. Be clear. Use shorter sentences if you perceive that the student is not fully understanding you. Although he probably has no hearing problem and may be paying attention, ----- may have difficulty understanding your main point and identifying important information. He has difficulty following directions, both verbal and written.

• Since ----- experiences various communication difficulties, do not rely on him to relay important messages to his parents about school events, assignments, school rules, etc. Even sending home a note for his parents may not work. ----- may not remember to deliver the note. Phone calls or e-mails to parents work best until the skill can be developed. ----- has a difficult time recalling events on demand from different parts of the day. He has never been able to answer questions like " what did you do at school today. " If a teacher does not tell me, for the most part, I don't know. He does spontaneously remember some things, and he has an excellent long-term memory. He remembers things forever once he remembers. Hopefully this will improve as he gets older and keeps working on it, but he may always need to write " everything " down.

• Going along with the previous note, ----- needs to write down more detail for assignments and notes than is typical. If it isn't written down, it is often as if it never happened. This includes strategies like having him verbally repeat things in his own words. This does not usually work, that is, he has forgotten it by the time he gets home. As said above, hopefully this will improve as he gets older and keeps working on it, but he may always need to write " everything " down.

• Assume nothing when assessing skills. For example, the individual with autism may be a " math whiz " in Algebra, but not able to make simple change at a cash register. Or, he may have an incredible memory about books he has read, speeches he has heard or sports statistics, but still may not be able to remember to bring a pencil to class. Uneven skills development is a hallmark of autism. ----- IQ test subscores range from the 1st percentile to the 99th percentile.

• -----' coordination disability causes him to sit back and let his teammates do all the physical work when working on things like science experiments. It is good to strike a balance, encouraging him to get some practice doing physical activities but not so much so that he is focusing more on simple physical movements than on learning the material.

• ----- shows anxiety or overwhelm by becoming very quiet and withdrawing from interaction. He gives the impression of being quiet and well-behaved when he is actually shutdown, possibly feeling very anxious. If he is not doing what he is supposed to be doing, talk to him about what is going on. Asperger's children tend to be very proud. If they cannot follow along in a class, they may attempt to resolve the issue by just refusing to do the work. It’s easier to say “No I won’t†then to say “I feel stupid not being able to do the work. Help me! " . In ----- case, he usually simply quietly doesn't do the work, and if asked says something casual to indicate he just didn't feel like it. He has gotten very good at this. To my experience, he is usually having some difficulty he doesn't feel comfortable admitting to rather than being unmotivated. It is very important to use language that does not connote that he missed something.

• An intensification of unusual behavior may mean escalating anxiety. For -----, such behavior might be talking to self (thinking out loud), possibly with anger, whole body tremoring and stiffness, dropping things and being unable to pick them up. ----- has never " lost it " at school. If that were to happen, it would probably be in the form of a verbal outburst. ----- is very un-physical, and his personality is mild besides, so he has never been violent.

• Processing speed: a lot of the accommodation for this is simply encouraging ----- to relax and take his time, possibly lessening the workload. He is getting pretty good at accommodating himself, as long as he is not rushed by someone else or by circumstances.

Summary----- may be a challenge sometimes, to both you and his classmates. We think this is normal in the circumstances and expected. We hope the difficult times will not let you lose perspective. Nothing works all the time, and sometimes things go great and sometimes they don't. We hope you will feel free to share with us, as we like to be able to support -----' teachers. Please remember that we know our child well, and whatever you say will not upset us or make us think poorly of you. Communication is key, even at -----' age, and we feel we can only provide the best for ----- by working together. Please do not hesitate to contact us if you have questions or think there is something we should know about.

I will give you a little background on ourselves. Neither of us have ever been teachers, so please don't hesitate to state the obvious. Also, ----- has not had an IEP before (he had a 504 Plan), so please have patience with us as we learn the system.

Thank you very much for all you do†" we are looking forward to a great year!Sincerely,

[Guest guest]

>

> Regarding letters. I understand totally about writing a letter for

> elementary. As for high school, should a letter be sent to every teacher my

> son has?

I'm glad you are feeling better about everything. I can only speak for what I

do. I send one to every single staff member that will have anything to do with

my son--all teachers, counselor and administration. You have to remember that

all these people, even teachers with autistic students assigned--even special ed

teachers unless they are specifically teaching autistic students--know very

little about autism or Asperger. If you don't give them a heads up, they will

have no idea why your son is sitting doing nothing while all the other students

are working, just for an example. Just that one simple example--think of all

the different conclusions they could come to (are any of them good?)--and how

you can explain it ahead of time and explain how your son gets confused or

misses things.

I also was talking to a special ed teacher at a local Asperger parents support

meeting (or rather, she was talking to the group). She said the intro letters

are so helpful to her; she loves it when parents do that. And she encouraged

doing it for all grades, up to and including 12th grade. She also said parents

who do things like this--their kids get much better teaching. She said there is

a big difference in the education the kids of parents who do things like this

get and other kids--said there is a big difference in what their IEPs look like.

Being a squeaky wheel and being questioning really does make a difference in

what your child will get.

[Guest guest]

Thanks for the idea of an intro letter. I have usually met with the teacher

before school but s is going into middle school this year and will have

several teachers so I wasn't sure what to do. Ruth, I was really impressed with

your letter. It gave me some ideas for creating my own. I met with his new

pricipal today and gave her the letter (which she loved) to pass around to any

teachers or support staff that could use it.

Here's the copy of my letter for you to look at in case it can give someone else

some ideas.

To the teachers of ........:

...... has been diagnosed with Pervasive Developmental Disorder – Not Otherwise

Specified (PDD-NOS) and Mild Aspergers Disorder both of which are Autism

Spectrum Disorders. He has also been diagnosed with an Anxiety Disorder. The

diagnosis was determined by Childrens Hospital, Child Development Center through

Neuropsycological testing. He is currently being treated by a Psychiatrist from

the Children's Hospital Medical Group and is on medication.

........ is intelligent in his own unique way. He has excellent rote memory and

reasoning skills. He has a very endearing personality and is quite social (on

his terms). His skills tend to be used only to further his own goals and

interests.

........ has significant Executive Dysfunction. What this means is that he may:

• Have difficulty with goal setting

• Have the sense that things happen or don't, little awareness of process

• Have difficulty getting started on tasks and shifting between them

• Tend to live in the moment

• Be unable to reflect on past experience to plan for the future, thus common

discipline measures, like incentives and consequences, produce little change in

behavior

• Continue to use the same strategy to solve a problem even when it has been

proven ineffective

• Switch between impulsivity to rigidity, often with rising anxiety over things

not turning out right

• Have difficulty adapting to change

• Rarely match a strategy to a problem before trying to solve it

• Tend to be both unrealistic about his abilities and very sensitive to

criticism

• Have difficulty overriding an emotion in order to behave appropriately in a

situation

• Have a very low tolerance for failure or frustration. He will quit rather

than try another approach, even when one is suggested.

• Tend to believe that accepting suggestions or help indicates weakness.

• Tend to decide that the source of his troubles is someone or something outside

of his control.

• Skip steps in a procedure and be baffled about the reason why the expected

outcome was not reached.

• Have difficulty putting a sequence of steps in order, or even realizing that

there are sub-goals to be accomplished on the way to the finish.

• Believe he knows something or doesn't, has little faith in effort

• Have difficulty shifting perspectives

• Need prompting to consider the feelings or views of others

• Fail to see the big picture, or the connections between details

Most of his academic challenges will point back to executive dysfunction.

It is common for people to be surprised that ...... has an Anxiety Disorder

because he tends to be aggressive when challenged. I like to explain it this

way:

People when frustrated, angry, hurt or scared tend to go into fight or flight

mode. ....... immediately goes into fight mode. When he was younger if he fell

down while running he would lash out, pounding his fist at the ground because

" it made him fall down " . As he has gotten older his logic and reasoning

ability has helped him mature in this way a little. He may still react in an

aggressive manner but he calms down much faster and is much more willing and

able to recognize that he has overreacted.

It is important to know that when he has behaved badly he generally is aware of

this on some level and becomes very anxious about what the consequences will be

which sends him into a fight mode. Any attempt to discipline at this point will

generally result in his becoming more and more aggressive. You will have more

success if your immediate response to bad behavior is calming and soothing.

Once the situation is diffused he will be reasonable about the consequences.

Somewhat typical of Aspergers is some sensory sensitivity. .......is mildly

affected by this. He can become agitated to loud noises or sounds that intrude

on his ability to concentrate. For example, he would rather not go to see

movies in the theater because " it gives him brain damage " (he gets a headache).

He will also become obsessed with picking at things. If he has a scab he may

repeatedly pick at it making it bleed. If there is glue on the desk he may

obsess over it until it is all gone. If his notebook gets a tear he will pick

at it making the rip bigger and bigger over time. If he is prevented from

finishing whatever he is picking at he will become agitated and aggressive.

Also typically he is very bad at making eye contact or watching what he is

directed to watch. He picks up a lot of information when listening despite the

fact that it may appear he is not paying attention.

.......... is really good at manipulating people and circumstances to get what he

wants. If he thinks he has figure out a way of getting what he wants he will

use it as much as he can. He will try over and over until he concludes that it

is no longer effective. For example, last year he figured out that if he just

" forgot " to bring home his homework he didn't have to do homework. He doesn't

care if he has to do the homework later at school or during recess because he

has achieved his goal which was to not do homework. In the same way if he

believes that there will be negative consequences to bringing home a note or

message he will just " forget " to bring it home. In his mind he will deal with

the consequences later. In that regard it is best to communicate with me

directly. I can be reached pretty much anytime on my cell phone .......or if

you prefer email my address is ...... which I check all throughout the day.

Finally, ........ is on several different medications. As is typical they loose

effectiveness as he grows. Please let me know if his behavior is problematic

because I can work with the Psychiatrist to try to address the problem.

Thank you,