Re: Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom

[Guest guest]

Well, I hope job corps counselor can find out.  That just sounds so odd.

Hugs to both of you.  I know when you kids hurts, it just breaks your heart.

Please keep us posted.

On Mon, Aug 17, 2009 at 1:13 PM, carolynsuelowerychattanooga <sue@...> wrote:

 

I don't know whether it is son's poor communication skills, or political stuff at workplace. Thank goodness, his Job Corps counselor will call and get the story so he can work on what ever deficits. Son thought they loved him, had no clue. So that makes it even harder. What really ticks me off is that they are supposed to (according to handbook) issue verbal warning if a problem. He got no negative feedback, just whomp, you're fired.

Sue> > >

> >> > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two> > days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am> > about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years...

> >> > At the meeting they cited that he told another employee how much money he> > made when the guy asked him. Another senior employee told him he could sit> > down, they were all caught up, and then same employee complained he wasn't

> > working. The boss told him at the end of the first day they were going to> > have him come in and do it by himself next weekend (after 3 days training> > and 5 days work) and then said at the firing he didn't work " independently

> > enough. " TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we> > do now?> >> > Sue in TN> >> > > >>

[Guest guest]

Carolyn,I have seeing many people around me that I am positive they must have a kind of mental problem or social problems or something else or simply they do not fix in and they still are able to work and held a job.Your son will find the right place to work for, please do not feel so bad. Do not believe that that company really really likes him so much, if they really likes him they will help him to be sucessful.One of our intern has been out of work for a long time and he does not get it right away, but we have been walking him by the hand...I suspect he must have more difficulties in learning than the average person..When one of our boss complaint about him, our big boss told the small boss to help the intern no matter what it takes anyway. I love my company for that...I have a lot of respect and admiration for our big boss. ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottomI don't know whether it is son's poor communication skills, or political stuff at workplace. Thank goodness, his Job Corps counselor will call and get the story so he can work on what ever deficits. Son thought they loved him, had no clue. So that makes it even harder. What really ticks me off is that they are supposed to (according to handbook) issue verbal warning if a problem. He got no negative feedback, just whomp, you're fired.Sue> > >> >> > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two> > days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am> > about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years...> >> > At the meeting they cited that he told another employee how much money he> > made when the guy asked him. Another senior employee told him he could sit> > down, they were all caught up, and then same employee complained he wasn't> > working. The boss told him at the end of the first day they were going to> > have him come in and do it by himself next weekend (after 3 days training> > and 5 days work) and then said at the firing he didn't work "independently> > enough." TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we> > do now?> >> > Sue in TN> >> > > >>

[Guest guest]

After I got a college degree I never got fired from a job. I used to have those jobs that hired me and hired me on the spot until I got a college degree..With a college degree you do not need to prove yourself because you already have prove yourself.You advise is very wise....I never thought about that issue until now. ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom>> I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years...> ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now?Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.

[Guest guest]

So,,,,,,does he understand now......about why there were problems?

Will Job Corps discuss it with him so that he can work on it in the future?

Also,,,,,,,,Since Job Corps helps him find a job (right?),,,,,,shouldn't the jobs be more willing to work with our kids? Willing to work with them and explain things? Maybe realize that they may not be totally "getting" what they are being asked?

It seems like those employers should be ready for kids with different issues.

Ugh.

Does he have a new place in mind? Is he ready or is he bummed out?

Robin

From: carolynsuelowerychattanooga <sue@...>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Monday, August 17, 2009, 3:00 PM

I got some additional feedback from DS Job Corps counselor who called his former employer. Apparently, in DS's enthusiasm and really wanting the job, anything they asked if he could do, he said "yes." The employer expected him literally to be able to take over full cooking operations after one week on the job and yet, his resume was clear that he'd worked in the school cafeteria for about 4 months. A case of very bad communication. There were other problems too, talking too much--same old problem that he had in previous job. And he went around discussing (bragging) about how much money he made to everyone. Also a problem. AARGH, I thought things had finally turned around and some of old bad behaviors were changed. He needs a prep cook position where he's chopping and prepping to cook, not in charge of a kitchen.I wish college was an option, unfortunately there is no way financially or mental capability-wise that he could do college. That is

why we were so delighted to find a vocational route.Sue in TN > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job

corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.>

[Guest guest]

K thnx 4 telling meSent from my Verizon Wireless BlackBerryFrom: "carolynsuelowerychattanooga" Date: Tue, 18 Aug 2009 13:17:10 -0000< >Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc. I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his " help " was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to " go everywhere " with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just " released " over 6,000 people on their list to get work. In regards to telling prospective employees about son's " issues. " With Job Corps we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that " oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD! " I think they would politely tell you " thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position. " Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway. See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!!!!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all! This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a " great " player. I think we are in the same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends. Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now. Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in. > > >

[Guest guest]

Oh what a story and how sad...how truly sad the system is. My heart goes out to you....but at the end you said ...he wants to go every where with you...take that as a blessing...try to be on the positive side of that...my son wants nothing to do with us...and would rather be any where but with us...he is 13 1/2 and I realize it is part of the teen thing...but when I read your post...that struck me...

Can you go back to his high school and ask guidance if they know of any place or any where he can get assistance or look for a job?

My heart goes out to you....you need to take a little break right now and chill...

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: carolynsuelowerychattanooga <sue@...>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 9:17 AM

These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc.I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his "help" was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to "go everywhere" with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just "released" over 6,000 people on their list to

get work.In regards to telling prospective employees about son's "issues." With Job Corps we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that "oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD!" I think they would politely tell you "thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position." Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway.See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the

Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!! !!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all!This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with

him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a "great" player. I think we are in the same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends.Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now.Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management

styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> >>

[Guest guest]

Oh Sue.....

So,,,,,,from the sounds of it, Job Corps, for you, sucked. I wonder, because of his age, can he apply for SS? So, at least, he can have some income coming it? Also,,,,maybe by going into the Soc Sec office and talking with someone, they MAY provide help with work?

Ugh.

Ya know,,,,I interned at The Arc (a place that deals with developmentally disabled adults) and that is where, if you have MR (mental retardation) of any sorts, you go to get help, etc.

It's seems such a shame that there isn't a legit place for kids with AS or other social issues to go to get some help/encouragement....or even a caseworker to be the "go-between" guy for your son in the job process..........doing what you said, kind of explaining your sons' postitive traits........explaining what they may encounter,.....but that they should stick it out because your son is amazing.....

Know what I mean? Hope I didn't ramble.

Just seems like we are told that there is, for instance, Job Corps,,,,,but in the end, it doesn't seem to cut it.

What the hell do our kids do?

You can't, as a mom of a 25 year old kid, go into his job and explain things......can you? He he.

What's your next move, Sue? Have you ever tried Soc Sec Office?

Robin

From: carolynsuelowerychattanooga <sue@...>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 8:17 AM

These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc.I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his "help" was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to "go everywhere" with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just "released" over 6,000 people on their list to

get work.In regards to telling prospective employees about son's "issues." With Job Corps we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that "oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD!" I think they would politely tell you "thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position." Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway.See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the

Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!! !!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all!This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with

him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a "great" player. I think we are in the same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends.Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now.Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management

styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> >>

[Guest guest]

On Apr 16, 10:08pm, " carolynsuelowerychattanooga " wrote:

}

} See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the Disability Navigator=

} Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers tha=

} t would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and ma=

} ke them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know=

} or DO anything. I am so frustrated!!!!!! I don't want to start this all ov=

It certainly seems like what they SHOULD be doing.

I know there are employers who have programs specifically for hiring

people with handicaps, I wonder if you could find one of those.

Willa

[Guest guest]

I agree with Janice´s advice and I should also suggest you may try to find any local Asperger support group,even if your son hasn´t a diagnosis.

in Sweden

Son with AS--- Den tis 2009-08-18 skrev rushen janice <jrushen@...>:

Från: rushen janice <jrushen@...>Ämne: Re: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottomTill: Datum: tisdag 18 augusti 2009 16.50

Oh what a story and how sad...how truly sad the system is. My heart goes out to you....but at the end you said ...he wants to go every where with you...take that as a blessing...try to be on the positive side of that...my son wants nothing to do with us...and would rather be any where but with us...he is 13 1/2 and I realize it is part of the teen thing...but when I read your post...that struck me...

Can you go back to his high school and ask guidance if they know of any place or any where he can get assistance or look for a job?

My heart goes out to you....you need to take a little break right now and chill...

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: carolynsuelowerycha ttanooga <sue@chasinglewisand clark.com>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 9:17 AM

These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc.I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his "help" was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to "go everywhere" with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just "released" over 6,000 people on their list to

get work.In regards to telling prospective employees about son's "issues." With Job Corps we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that "oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD!" I think they would politely tell you "thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position." Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway.See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the

Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!! !!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all!This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with

him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a "great" player. I think we are in the same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends.Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now.Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps

could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> >>

Låna pengar utan säkerhet.

Sök och jämför lån hos Kelkoo.

[Guest guest]

Sue,,,

Thanks for all of the info you have provided.......sorry that it's from your bad experiences.

It's so hard to hear about him falling through the cracks.............I feel this with my son,,,yet he's just 13, so I haven't had to deal with the issues that you're dealing with, yet.

My heart goes out to you and your son.

It does sound, though, that you are an incredible mom and advocate. I'm sorry you are so upset right now. It's totally understandable.

I hope someone who's reading this stuff has "been there" and can give you some advice....

Robin

From: carolynsuelowerychattanooga <sue@...>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 12:39 PM

No, I loved Job Corps, it was his one and only opportunity to get training and they did a pretty good job of that. It is just at the end and the Job Placment part. I highly recommend Job Corps. But I know with some of the professions, such as welding, they work closely with industry, and funnel the kids right into an internship. The employer knows what to expect and they have immediate job. But not with culinary. This instant job is also with carpentry and HVAC. Unfortunately my son could do none of those and had zero interest, but huge interest in the cooking.He is like the poster child for falls through the cracks...he tests around 70 + or minus a few points for MR. So right on the border. ARC is wonderful organization and they helped me get him on the waiting list for services in TN, along with 6,000 other individuals. ..and then he was the first to be "purged" from the wait list. They cited an IQ test of 77 that the examiner stated

herself was invalid because of prompting. I tried to fight, letters, turned down by many attorneys because they worked with state, no money to educate an attorney about an IEP. So he kind of falls into that gray area of SSI, too. I am in such a foul mood, sorry, thanks for the encouragement, but today I just want to throw something, pitch a fit, have a melt down. I am tired of doing this! I'll be better tomorrow!So we are taking a step back, searching for "entry level" positions. If I just knew enough people (and I have talked to all my network) that was willing to take and train him a little more. We are working on that. But I just don't see how you go into the interview and tell them about a disability you have.Thanks!Sue in Tn > > > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh.

What do we do now? > > > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> > >> >>

[Guest guest]

I applied for SSI for my girl, the first time it got denied, the second time I went to the social security administration in person with all her medical records and a few months after I got the approval letter. Because of my income she did not qualify for getting a ssi check, but I got suplementary mass health insurance for her which help with medical expenses.When my daugther be 18, if she still quality, she will be entitle to get full benefits of SSI.My friend's son after several years of failure in holding a job, in staying in college because of learning disabilities, finally got a diagnosis from a psychiatrist, which helped him to get SSI. At this time he is holding a part time job and getting SSI.From: " and/or Robin Lemke" <jrisjs@...> Sent: Tuesday, August 18, 2009 1:25:36 PM GMT -05:00 US/Canada EasternSubject: Re: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottomOh Sue..... So,,,,,,from the sounds of it, Job Corps, for you, sucked. I wonder, because of his age, can he apply for SS? So, at least, he can have some income coming it? Also,,,,maybe by going into the Soc Sec office and talking with someone, they MAY provide help with work? Ugh.Ya know,,,,I interned at The Arc (a place that deals with developmentally disabled adults) and that is where, if you have MR (mental retardation) of any sorts, you go to get help, etc.It's seems such a shame that there isn't a legit place for kids with AS or other social issues to go to get some help/encouragement....or even a caseworker to be the "go-between" guy for your son in the job process..........doing what you said, kind of explaining your sons' postitive traits........explaining what they may encounter,.....but that they should stick it out because your son is amazing.....Know what I mean? Hope I didn't ramble.Just seems like we are told that there is, for instance, Job Corps,,,,,but in the end, it doesn't seem to cut it.What the hell do our kids do?You can't, as a mom of a 25 year old kid, go into his job and explain things......can you? He he.What's your next move, Sue? Have you ever tried Soc Sec Office? RobinFrom: carolynsuelowerychattanooga <sue@...>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 8:17 AM These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc.I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his "help" was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to "go everywhere" with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just "released" over 6,000 people on their list to get work.In regards to telling prospective employees about son's "issues." With Job Corps we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that "oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD!" I think they would politely tell you "thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position." Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway.See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!! !!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all!This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a "great" player. I think we are in the same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends.Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now.Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> >>

[Guest guest]

That is what I always thought....that is good that he is getting SSI and working part time.

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"From: carolynsuelowerycha ttanooga <sue@chasinglewisand clark.com>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 8:17 AM These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift

a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc.I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his "help" was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to "go everywhere" with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just "released" over 6,000 people on their list to get work.In regards to telling prospective employees about son's "issues." With Job Corps

we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that "oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD!" I think they would politely tell you "thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position." Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway.See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would

fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!! !!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all!This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a "great" player. I think we are in the

same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends.Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now.Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a

college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> >>

[Guest guest]

That's wonderful that they are able to get SSI. What job/s do they have?

RobinFrom: carolynsuelowerycha ttanooga <sue@chasinglewisand clark.com>Subject: ( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom Date: Tuesday, August 18, 2009, 8:17 AM These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of this. They did not lift

a finger or do one single thing to work with him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes, cover letters, researched the options, etc.I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his "help" was to give son a list of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to "go everywhere" with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just "released" over 6,000 people on their list to get work.In regards to telling prospective employees about son's "issues." With Job Corps

we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was something. And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your tell someone in interview that "oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD!" I think they would politely tell you "thanks for coming by, but you are not right for this position." Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions, that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an interview in a positive way, especially when you have trouble communicating what is in your head anyway.See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the Disability Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW employers that would

fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with. But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!! !!!! I don't want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't sink in at all!This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the ball with him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and thought he was a "great" player. I think we are in the

same situation here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On the other hand, the facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take over their kitchen on weekends.Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us. Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that right now.Sue in TN > > > > > > I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25 years... > > > > > ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial. Sheesh. What do we do now? > > > > Well, consider there are lots of different management styles. Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One thing you/he/job corps could find out about the next job is how much the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve, etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your son. Jobs that require a

college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.> >>

[Guest guest]

Well, welcome to gov't bureaucracy in action. Imagine if we parents

could design and implement real working programs for our kids, knowing

what they need and how to help, instead of these half useless things

that are in place? I know, dream on...

In our state, even more frustrating is that it depends on where you

live in the state as to what programs you may find. Some places help

HF kids without a blink and have programs in place while other counties

don't.

I wonder if you can find a social skill group in your area? I know,

that sounds almost laughable in your state of mind right now. But I

know of a few for older kids in my area now. I think it is an idea

that is gaining momentum anyway. A lot of aspie-ish kids are starting

to graduate high school and now what? So it tends to address that need

in the larger city areas. I don't know how far you are from a larger

city.

I have other ideas but you will just get upset with me for saying what

isn't available and what you can't afford. I know the feeling! It is

really frustrating to have kids that could do well if they just had

some extra guidance and without it, won't/can't do much of anything.

Just take a breather, rest up and then try try again. If you find the

right " fit " for a job, he would do so well. But finding it is the

problem. There is a book I recall for the older20AS kid that he might

do well to read. Here are three more I found as well -->

Asperger Syndrome Employment Workbook: An Employment Workbook for

Adults With Asperger Syndrome by Meyer

How to Find Work That Works for People with Asperger Syndrome: The

Ultimate Guide for Getting People With Asperger Syndrome into the

Workplace (and Keeping Them There!) by Gail Hawkins

Employment for Individuals With Asperger Syndrome or Non-Verbal

Learning Disability: Stories and Strategies by Yvona Fast

Preparing for Life: The Complete Guide for Transitioning to Adulthood

for Those with Autism and Asperger's Syndrome by Jed Baker

Roxanna

" The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do

nothing. " E. Burke

( ) Re: was on top of the world, now on bottom

 

These are great questions! No, Job Corps is not willing to do any of

this. They did not lift a finger or do one single thing to work with

him to get a job...my son and I did it ALL. We prepared the resumes,

cover letters, researched the options, etc.

I thought once he was released from Job Corps in Gadsden and turned

over the local job counselor, we'd get more help. But his " help " was to

give son a li

st of sites where he could look up jobs. I was very

frustrated in talking with this counselor yesterday to discuss why son

was let go, he seemed incredulous that son didn't know to not discuss

salary, and very sarcastically suggested maybe I would have to " go

everywhere " with son to assist. I was ticked at his smart aleck

attitude. I had asked before he started interviewing for some role

playing and interview help...job counselor did agree to give him thirty

minutes. And Voc Rehab in Tennessee just " released " over 6,000 people

on their list to get work.

In regards to telling prospective employees about son's " issues. " With

Job Corps we just told them DS has learning disabilities and left it at

that. They had copies of IEP's. He's never had a formal diagnosis of

Aspergers or Autism, just a lot of speculation that there was

something.

And how in the world, when you have poor communication skills, do your

tell someone in interview that " oh, by the way, I have autism, or LD! "

I think they would politely tell you " thanks for coming by, but you are

not right for this position. " Maybe I am wrong, I hope so. SInce DS

disabilities are not that apparent, I told him how to tell someone

during training, things like asking them to slow down in instructions,

that he is ADD. But I just don't know how you bring that up in an

interview in a positive way, especially when you have troubl

e

communicating what is in your head anyway.

See, this is what I thought Job Corps would do and the Disability

Navigator Coordinator from the state that we met with, they would KNOW

employers that would fit, that they could call and pitch son's positive

qualities and make them aware of areas he might have difficulties with.

But they don't know or DO anything. I am so frustrated!!!!!! I don't

want to start this all over again and it is so close to the same crap

that he did on last job. Only there, at that job, they would TRY and

tell him you don't brag about money or this or that, apparently didn't

sink in at all!

This reminded me so much of before son went to Job Corps and played

softball with church team. Because he had a uniform, he believed he

could play. He couldn't. As catcher, I don't think he ever caught more

than one ball in his life. The men of the team were wonderful, let him

play, and encouraged him because they could tell how passionate he was

and loved the game. But he would NEVER practice, even if we'd throw the

ball with him...just got into playing the role with a uniform and

thought he was a " great " player. I think we are in the same situation

here. He wears chef pants and a shirt, and thinks he can do it. He

couldn't even make potato salad when they asked him to do that. So what

the heck has he been learning at Job Corps? On t

he other hand, the

facility was crazy to look at his resume that he'd worked four months

in school cafeteria and think he was ready, with no training, to take

over their kitchen on weekends.

Whew, I feel better now after ranting. I am just so tired. Tired of

helping, tired of trying, tired of nothing changing. It is unbelievably

hard to have him living here again and in my face every minute of the

day and wanting to go everywhere with me and do everything with us.

Thanks for all the cool headed advice from all...I need some of that

right now.

Sue in TN

& gt; & gt; & gt;

& gt; & gt; & gt; I wrote last week that DS, 25 had new job, well after

two days, only two days he was fired this morning. The reasons he cited

just don't fit...I am about a low as I have ever, ever been in 25

years...

& gt; & gt;

& gt; & gt; & gt; ... TWO DAYS, that was all they gave him as a trial.

Sheesh. What do we do now?

& gt; & gt;

& gt; & gt; Well, consider there are lots of different management styles.

Just because he failed at this job doesn't mean he will at another. One

thing you/he/job corps could find=2

0out about the next job is how much

the management at the proposed place is into on-the-job training. Some

places don't mind training on the job, allowing for a learning curve,

etc. while other places want the employee to be able to step onto the

job prepared to take full responsbilities. Another thing to consider is

maybe whether low-level (non-college) jobs are going to work for your

son. Jobs that require a college diploma (bachelors degree) are a lot

more forgiving than lower level jobs. People are given a lot more

benefit of the doubt, for the most part. Your son may need to go to

college to be qualified for a job he can survive in.

& gt; & gt;

& gt;