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My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.

He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some

imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding

the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass

him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the

other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting

the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a

little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as

possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from

the Twin Cities?

Thanks,

Deb

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>

> My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.

> He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some

> imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding

the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass

him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the

other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

> What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if

contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling

you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as

smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out

there from the Twin Cities?

> Thanks,

> Deb

>

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>

> My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.

> He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some

> imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding

the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass

him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the

other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

> What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if

contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling

you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as

smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out

there from the Twin Cities?

We need to know a little more about your son's situation and what you have

already done in order to be able to advise you. Does he have an IEP or 504?

What is the plan for dealing with his Asperger at school? Will he have some

sort of freshman/new student " camp " before school starts? How about freshman

orientation? What do teachers and school administrators already know about your

son? Have you and/or your son met his teachers or will have met them before

school starts?

That said, I'm not sure what you are looking for, but I have an Asperger son

starting 9th grade (14yo). He is also starting high school, so I can tell you

what we have done to prepare him. Not enough, I might add, but at least

something. I wrote an introductory letter to all teachers and school

administrators assigned to him. It gives a little introduction to Asperger,

gives my son's strengths, weaknesses, special interests, and challenges that may

not be obvious (like what anxiety and shutdown mode look like with him,

pragmatic language advice that most people don't know about). He has an IEP,

and I didn't repeat stuff that I know they will deal with on their own. He also

had a freshman " camp " that was one Friday evening, then freshman orientation was

a couple of hours. I found out that he didn't go find his classrooms during

orientation, but he didn't have any problem finding classes in public jr high,

so I think he is okay there. For the same reasons, I let him go by himself to

orientation. Parents were welcome, so you could go and make sure he finds all

his classes and can open his locker, etc., since your son is not used to public

school. Also, public high schools are practically open all year long because of

all the activities, so you can take him and let him check it out as many times

as you want. In our school district, high school principals only get 3 weeks

vacation in the summer and the rest of the summer the school is open normal

business hours. I would leave it up to him whether you drive him or he takes

the bus. At his age, he probably knows what he is comfortable with. Some kids

have a lot of trouble on the bus, but not all. My son has no problems on the

bus at all; he has been riding a school bus since first grade. In your case, I

would definitely e-mail/phone all his teachers as soon as you get his schedule.

At the very least let them know about his Aspergers and let them know he has

been out of public school for several years. I would feel free to give them

suggestions on what your son will need to be successful in their classrooms. I

don't know if this is helpful; hope so. Good luck!

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If you have a chance to take him to school beforehand..possibly even finding the route the bus will take and take him that way, get to the school indroduce him to the administrators and maybe some teachers will be there.

Do you have an IEP in place? If you do then make sure his teachers are aware what is in it. Some times tachers are just shown "snapshot" plans because of Hippa laws and those have to be under lock and key. Sometimes the regular ed teacher forgets to look at them once in a while.

When you talk to the teachers, I would suggest you go in with the attitude of being proactive but not antagonistic. Be clear on what you want for your child. Try to work with the school at first..meaning the teacher first..many parents go directly to the principal or above before communicating with the teacher and that creates bad feelings all the way around. You may want to request weekly email communications with the teachers..that way things can be nipped before they get out of hand.

Also make sure you understand what they are saying to you and vice versa. That too helps avoid bad feelings. Let them know what your son's interests are. and try to ues them to make the transition smooth..

Does your son have a peer at the school he talks to that is understanding?

I'm just trying to suggest ways that my collegues like to be approached to be approached. The last thing you want for you and your son is to be the person who comes through the door and everyone thinks oh no not her again.

Good luck

M Hawthorne

( ) Going back to school

My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?Thanks,Deb

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That is a good idea about taking the bus route, seeing the school.

The IEP isn't in place yet.  They won't do that until the school tests him.

They want to see just how much he needs.  I have always made sure

I approach my kids teachers in a very kind way.  I have always had

real good relationships with them.  Thanks for the input!

On Sun, Aug 16, 2009 at 2:59 PM, Hawthorne <tboner1@...> wrote:

 

If you have a chance to take him to school beforehand..possibly even finding the route the bus will take and take him that way, get to the school indroduce him to the administrators and maybe some teachers will be there.

 

Do you have an IEP in place? If you do then make sure his teachers are aware what is in it. Some times tachers are just shown " snapshot " plans because of Hippa laws and those have to be under lock and key. Sometimes the regular ed teacher forgets to look at them once in a while.

 

When you talk to the teachers, I would suggest you go in with the attitude of being proactive but not antagonistic. Be clear on what you want for your child. Try to work with the school at first..meaning the teacher first..many parents go directly to the principal or above before communicating with the teacher and that creates bad feelings all the way around. You may want to request weekly email communications with the teachers..that way things can be nipped before they get out of hand.

 

Also make sure you understand what they are saying to you and vice versa. That too helps avoid bad feelings. Let them know what your son's interests are. and try to ues them to make the transition smooth..

 

Does your son have a peer at the school he talks to that is understanding?

 

I'm just trying to suggest ways that my collegues like to be approached to be approached. The last thing you want for you and your son is to be the person who comes through the door and everyone thinks oh no not her again.

Good luck

M Hawthorne 

( ) Going back to school

 

My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?

Thanks,Deb

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Good for you on your communication style. :) And good luck and a great year for you and your son.

( ) Going back to school

My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?Thanks,Deb

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Thanks a bunch!

On Sun, Aug 16, 2009 at 5:17 PM, Hawthorne <tboner1@...> wrote:

 

 Good for you on your communication style. :) And good luck and a great year for you and your son.

( ) Going back to school

 

My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?

Thanks,Deb

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Oh Deb,

I totally hear you!!

We're sending our son back this year, too, after 2 years of on line. We're thrilled that he's wanting to go back and yet terrified of what it was like when we decided to pull him out. He's changed and grown up so much since then, so warning the new school of his "old ways" seems kind of mean to our son. YET,,,,if we don't say thing, like how it was and what happens when he gets stressed, etc, we aren't preparing the school to be able to do what they could be doing to help him....and we're hurting our kids in the process.

Our son is just going into 8th grade, compared to yours going into 10th,,,,but what we did was tell them how it was before,,,,,,what worked, what obviously didn't. BUT,,,,we were continually telling them how much he's changed and grown up.

Good luck..........I'll be thinkin of you......he he. Ian starts next Monday. What about yours?

Robin

Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine!!!

From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@...>Subject: ( ) Going back to school Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM

My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?Thanks,Deb

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Caleb starts Sept. 1st. Thanks, I will thinking of you all as well.

In , and/or Robin Lemke <jrisjs@...> wrote:

>

> Oh Deb,

> I totally hear you!!

> We're sending our son back this year, too, after 2 years of on line. 

> We're thrilled that he's wanting to go back and yet terrified of what it was

like when we decided to pull him out.

> He's changed and grown up so much since then, so warning the new school of his

" old ways " seems kind of mean to our son. 

> YET,,,,if we don't say thing, like how it was and what happens when he gets

stressed, etc, we aren't preparing the school to be able to do what they could

be doing to help him....and we're hurting our kids in the process.

> Our son is just going into 8th grade, compared to yours going into 10th,,,,but

what we did was tell them how it was before,,,,,,what worked, what obviously

didn't.  BUT,,,,we were continually telling them how much he's changed and grown

up.

>  

> Good luck..........I'll be thinkin of you......he he.  Ian starts next

Monday.  What about yours?

>  

> Robin

> Normal is just a cycle on a washing machine!!!

>

>

>

>

> From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@...>

> Subject: ( ) Going back to school

>

> Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM

>

>

>  

>

>

>

> My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.

> He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some

> imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding

the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass

him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the

other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

> What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if

contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling

you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as

smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out

there from the Twin Cities?

> Thanks,

> Deb

>

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Deb,

I would contact the school guidance counselor and do it now before he starts. Maybe she can make arrangements for him to meet some of his teachers. Has he taken a tour of the school? Does he know anyone going there? How does HE feel about riding the bus???? Ask him....see what he thinks and feels. It may be good for him to ride the first day...

Does he have a cell phone where he can call you if he panics...I would let the school know about this. How has he done in the past riding on a large bus? My son didn't do too well so now he rides on the smaller one and likes it much better. He doesn't get teased and it isn't as noisy!

Type a list of information about your son, his strenghts and weaknesses...things he has trouble with such as noises or lights. Give it to his guidance counselor or case manager so that the teachers can have a copy...write anything that will help the teachers understand your child and help them in teaching him. It should make it a little bit easier for him.

Just a few thoughts...my son starts August 31 and he is going into 8th too. He rides the smaller bus. He hates school and homework...so I am not looking forward to the stress...and I mean stress.

Jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"> > > From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@ ...>> Subject: ( ) Going back to school> > Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM>

> > > > > > My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.> He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some > imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.> What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?> Thanks,> Deb>

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He hasn't rode a school bus in about 4 yrs. I think it will be ok..but, yes, I

will ask him. I will be talking with school this week. I all the ideas that

have come my way. I am so glad I came to this support group. It has helped in

many ways.

Homework in the past has been really stressful, but this has literally been home

work...as he has been learning at home. Now that we have him dianosed, he is on

Concerta for ADHD, and already I see a difference in his focusing. I hope this

will help with his studies.

Seeing so many going through what we are is comforting in a way, as I see how

you are all being successful in coping with the things that come up in your

lives. I appreciate all your suggestions immensely.

Y'all have a good night.

> >

> >

> > From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@ ...>

> > Subject: ( ) Going back to school

> >

> > Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM

> >

> >

> >  

> >

> >

> >

> > My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.

> > He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some

> > imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding

the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass

him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the

other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

> > What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if

contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling

you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as

smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out

there from the Twin Cities?

> > Thanks,

> > Deb

> >

>

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Good work Deb....and it is great to have you. I know this site is a blessing to me too. But, be aware, we are not all successful all the time. It is hard and a lot of work....stress is on the top of my list....but that is why we are all here. So rely on everyone...there is great advice to be had here.

jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@...>Subject: ( ) Re: Going back to school Date: Monday, August 17, 2009, 10:39 PM

He hasn't rode a school bus in about 4 yrs. I think it will be ok..but, yes, I will ask him. I will be talking with school this week. I all the ideas that have come my way. I am so glad I came to this support group. It has helped in many ways.Homework in the past has been really stressful, but this has literally been home work...as he has been learning at home. Now that we have him dianosed, he is on Concerta for ADHD, and already I see a difference in his focusing. I hope this will help with his studies.Seeing so many going through what we are is comforting in a way, as I see how you are all being successful in coping with the things that come up in your lives. I appreciate all your suggestions immensely.Y'all have a good night.> > > > > > From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@ ...>> > Subject: ( ) Going back to school> > > > Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM> > > > > >

> > > > > > > > My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.> > He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some > > imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.> > What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?> > Thanks,> > Deb> >>

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Deb,

It is good you found this site....I found it a couple of years ago or maybe last year..ha ha...but it is a great site, wonderful people and lots of knowledge. We are not all successful but that is why we are here to support each other and try to help each other. So welcome ...I am sure you'll love this site.

jan

Janice Rushen

"I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope"

From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@...>Subject: ( ) Re: Going back to school Date: Monday, August 17, 2009, 10:39 PM

He hasn't rode a school bus in about 4 yrs. I think it will be ok..but, yes, I will ask him. I will be talking with school this week. I all the ideas that have come my way. I am so glad I came to this support group. It has helped in many ways.Homework in the past has been really stressful, but this has literally been home work...as he has been learning at home. Now that we have him dianosed, he is on Concerta for ADHD, and already I see a difference in his focusing. I hope this will help with his studies.Seeing so many going through what we are is comforting in a way, as I see how you are all being successful in coping with the things that come up in your lives. I appreciate all your suggestions immensely.Y'all have a good night.> > > > > > From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@ ...>> > Subject: ( ) Going back to school> > > > Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM> > > > > >

> > > > > > > > My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.> > He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some > > imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.> > What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?> > Thanks,> > Deb> >>

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Oh, please know this, I so understand the hard work, and tears that go with this.

This system of things we live in is hard in every which way.  I just appreciate having

a 'sounding board' if you will.  You can talk to friends about this, but unless they totally understand

AS & ADHD etc..you sometimes feel like you are talking to a wall.  My friends look at me and nod, but

I know they just do not totally get it.  I know y'all do.

On Tue, Aug 18, 2009 at 3:47 AM, rushen janice <jrushen@...> wrote:

 

Good work Deb....and it is great to have you.  I know this site is a blessing to me too.  But, be aware, we are not all successful all the time.  It is hard and a lot of work....stress is on the top of my list....but that is why we are all here. So rely on everyone...there is great advice to be had here.

 

jan

Janice Rushen

 

" I will try to be open to all avenues of wisdom and hope "

From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@...>Subject: ( ) Re: Going back to school

Date: Monday, August 17, 2009, 10:39 PM

 

He hasn't rode a school bus in about 4 yrs. I think it will be ok..but, yes, I will ask him. I will be talking with school this week. I all the ideas that have come my way. I am so glad I came to this support group. It has helped in many ways.

Homework in the past has been really stressful, but this has literally been home work...as he has been learning at home. Now that we have him dianosed, he is on Concerta for ADHD, and already I see a difference in his focusing. I hope this will help with his studies.

Seeing so many going through what we are is comforting in a way, as I see how you are all being successful in coping with the things that come up in your lives. I appreciate all your suggestions immensely.Y'all have a good night.

> > > > > > From: debbieln60 <Debbieln60@ ...>> > Subject: ( ) Going back to school

> > > > Date: Sunday, August 16, 2009, 12:28 PM> > > > > >   > > > > > > > > My son will be going back to regular public schooling this year.

> > He has been online schooling for the past several years. I need some > > imput. This will be his first day at high school. He's 15. He will be riding the bus. Now, for his first day should I drive him? I don't want to embarrass him by being driven to school by mommy, if you know what I mean. But, on the other hand, it is a new school. New kids.

> > What if he should become panicky and no one understands? I wonder if contacting the school social worker about this would help? I don't mind telling you I am a little stressed about this. I just want the transition to go as smoothly as possible. Any advice would be appreciated. By the way, anyone out there from the Twin Cities?

> > Thanks,> > Deb> >>

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