FURIOUS about principal's dealings...

[Guest guest]

Ok, I need some perspective… I’m pretty upset, so I’m

coming to you guys who have likely “been there, done that” and can

provide me with some direction and insight.

My boy, 9, AS (and possible ADHD co-existing), has been really

struggling at school (think I told you guys about the choking incident last

week). Anyway… for the last while, he’s been having an extremely

hard time on the bus with kids bullying him. And BLATENT bullying. Three days

ago, there were several kids who threw food packages at him on the bus. He

chucked it back in their direction, and went and told the bus driver, who had

him sit closer to the front of the bus. So that was fine – he dealt with

that good.

Two days ago was awful… he came in the house so upset, was

completely shut down, and spent the better part of afterschool and into the

evening upstairs in his room, not wanting to come out, and not wanting to do

anything but play his DS (his obsession). After talking to him about it later

on, he was able to name a few specific names of children, but then added “and

the big kids at the back of the bus” (all the grade 5’s and 6’s).

I couldn’t get any more details out of him, other than they were being

mean.

Thankfully, his teacher dealt with it BEAUTIFULLY. Between her

and the guidance counselor at the school, they spoke to each of the “main”

children who were involved – individually first, and then as a group.

They all admitted to what they had been doing, and knew it was wrong. Said that

wasn’t doing anything, was sitting quietly, minding his own

business, playing his DS (which is what he does EVERY DAY on the bus, to help

ignore the sheer VOLUME on that bus, which would otherwise make him insane

lol). One of the kids started teasing about “LOVING” a girl

in his class, because he goes to her house to play a lot. (I was proud of my

boy this morning, who told me that “it shouldn’t matter who I play

with Mom”. They play together a lot because they like the same things.

Brittany likes BECAUSE he’s not like the other boys. He’s

not rough and tumble. HE LIKES to sit down and do crafts with her. He’s

the perfect friend for her lol). Anyway… the next thing, a child got in

his face and said “PEANUT PEANUT PEANUT” (he’s DEATHLY

allergic to peanuts… this infuriates me). And then they started teasing

him about playing his DS so much, and calling him mean names and swearing at

him. Apparently, he’d told them to stop quite a few times, and they weren’t

stopping – and the last one who got in his face got hit. Yup, hit

him.

In talking to the guidance councellor, he said that he wasn’t

going to make a big deal of hitting, because he was being BLATENTLY

bullied, and had been pushed to that point. We could hardly blame him. And I

won’t be saying anything to about it either.

The principal, who I am NOT fond of, was not at the school the

last two days. ’s teacher (Whom I LOVE) was acting principal. So

she dealt with everything with the kids yesterday. They ALL had to write

apology letters to , and will be presenting him with them today.

will not be expected to write an apology letter.

’s teacher and I filled the principal in on what we dealt

with yesterday… and the FIRST words out of her mouth were…

“Well, despite what the other children did, it wasn’t

ok for to hit.”

WHAT?!!! That’s ALL you’ve got to say??? I told her

that the guidance councellor and I had agreed that we didn’t blame

for that, because he had tried to ask them to stop, and they weren’t

stopping. And with kids IN HIS FACE on the bus, he was either gonna hit

somebody, or push them out of the way to get up and go see the bus driver

about it. I told her that I wasn’t going to tell my child he couldn’t

stand up for himself, or let him sit there and be the victim of BLATENT

bullying, without so much as looking out for his own interests. That’s

crap.

THIS is the kind of repeat treatment I get from this principal

“Complaint” protocol states, that if you have a problem

with a principal, you should FIRST try to address it with the principal. If

then it’s not resolved, you proceed to the district level. I would like

to write the principal a letter, email, whatever… outlying my thoughts

and feelings on this treatment of , and request a meeting between her,

myself, my husband, and the guidance councellor. If push comes to shove, I’ll

request or hire an advocate be present, because I’m not gonna tolerate

this anymore.

Any ideas on how I should approach this? What kinds of things I

Should be outlying in the letter?

Thanks in advance, for making it through my long rambles

=)