Just entering the diagnostic process

March 19, 2010

Hi there,

I'm and I'm new here. I have a 6 1/2 year old daughter who we are just in

the beginning of the diagnostic process. We believe she has Asperger's

Syndrome. At school, they see nothing wrong- she's just " a bit different " , but

at home it's a whole different scenario. She is able to hold things together

and quell her anxiety at school, and then she just explodes when she gets home.

She is super smart, but socially has a lot of difficulty with knowing when

people are annoyed, or how to join a group, how to take turns having the idea

for the group, how to interact verbally and so on. She has horrible meltdowns

at home, that have gotten shorter with the therapy we've tried for her, but even

that does not seem to be enough. When her therapist finally saw the meltdowns

we were describing, she was just dumbfounded and really at a loss as to how to

help us. So we have her on the waiting list for assessment at a reputable place

that deals with ASD.

As a mom, it is heartbreaking to watch her try to interact and make friends and

have it all go wrong. I try to be there to coach her through situations in the

neighborhood when I can. For the families that have known her since she was

born, this is just normal for her and my presence doesn't negatively impact the

situation, but as she is getting older- first grade now- it is weird to her new

friends if I intervene or am too close to their games or whatever. So I try to

keep my distance. I still have a close eye on the interactions and try to walk

her through difficulties after the friend has gone home, but sometimes it is too

late and we don't really see that friend around too much anymore.

To top things off we are almost 100% sure my husband has Asperger's as well. He

is also at the start of the diagnostic process. I took a course on AS with my

daughter in mind, but ended up seeing my husband jump off the pages of the texts

and out of the videos we watched. He is all for a diagnosis, as he's always

felt different and life has at times been a real struggle for him socially and

emotionally. However this also leaves me in a bit of a weird place because he

doesn't really get where I am coming from or understand my whole view of the

situation.

I am sorry to ramble on like this, but I'm feeling a bit overwhelmed and would

welcome any advice, suggestions, feedback, or support from anyone who has been

where I am now, as either a parent or a spouse. It's been quite difficult to

find others who have been in my situation since I am new to all this.

Thanks!

Recommended Posts