Need some ideas PLEASE...sorry this is long!

[Guest guest]

Hi,

I was wondering if I could get some of your thoughts on a current situation with

my son's school. Sorry in advance, this is going to be a bit long.

Let me start with a little background. On Dec 9th, my son had two meltdowns at

school (crying, refusing to comply) that ended up with the school having my son

call my husband who calmed him down and he was fine. So...that evening the

principle calls my husband and leaves a message on his cell saying...that due to

our son having had such a bad day that they were going to put him in isolation

the next day and he would have to earn his way back to his classroom. (he is

already in a self-contained classroom with only 4 other students) She also said

that if he was compliant and did his work and didn't become beligerant in the

morning, that by lunch he could go back to his class. But...if he didn't do his

work or became beligerant that they would have to go ahead with the suspension

and we would be called to come pick him up.

We briefed our son about what his principle said would happen the next day to

prepare him. We told him to make sure his tried his best and just do his work

and keep quiet.

So the next morning he was placed in the school psychologist's office. He did

his work in the morning and stayed quiet. He then ate his lunch in her office

(his lunch is at 10:15) and finished his work. Then the school psychologist had

to leave for some reason and his BSP class teacher came in to take over. She

gave him additional work and told him he could not come back to class until it

was complete. Since this is not what we were initially told my son let her know.

He said he wasn't going to do the work because he was good all morning and did

all the other work he was given and he was suppose to be able to go back to

class now. So, because he was refusing to comply and by doing so was being

beligerant (this is what we were told) I received a phone call at about 1045

from the assistant principle that we needed to pick our son up.

I told her that I didn't understand why they had changed what we were originally

told and that I'm sure my son feels the same way. I then asked to speak to him.

I calmed him down and told him I understood his frustration but to just do the

work and we would have a meeting with the principle. He said ok and went back to

doing his work. I then spoke to the assistant principle again and she said I

still needed to pick him up. She then threatened me, that if I was refusing to

pick him up that she would call jeuvenile to pick him up. (I'm leaving a lot of

other things out that she said to try to keep this as short as possible)

Anyway, so my husband goes to pick up our son. When he gets there, our son

didn't even know he was still being suspended. He was totally surprised and

confused. My husband left with our son without anyone saying anything to him or

giving him the usual suspension form.

The following week we e-mailed the principle requesting the paperwork that we

weren't given. We didn't hear back from her until just this last Wednesday after

my husband sent her a second e-mail. Her response was...that our son was in

" isolation " and that we were asked to pick him up because of his refusal to do

his work and that because he was allowed to participate for most of the day,

that it was not considered a suspension. OMG!! I cannot believe the nerve of

them!

See, this suspension made it NINE days so far this year that they have suspended

him. I bet they didn't think about that at the time, but now are trying to back

peddle and are trying to say that it wasn't a suspension. Of course my husband

wrote her back and quoted the message she left on his cell (that we still have)

where she specificaly used the word suspension as well as told her the time of

day I received the phone call (1045). He again asked for the paperwork we

requested. So far no response from her.

So that is my story...again sorry so long. We have an IEP meeting already

scheduled for this Tuesday. What should we say/do if she still hasn't responded

or if she has but is still trying to say it wasn't a suspension? We are taking

an advocate from The Arc of TN with us this time. But I still wanted to ask the

group if anyone has any ideas.

Any ideas would be very much appreciated!

~ne