Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he thinks reading those books will make it easy. Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think? Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the intelligence of a college grad. I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon but then I remind myself " It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn. " That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live with my decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I am a single father of three boys and my oldest one has Asperger's. I am struggling every day to do the right thing and every day I learn something new. Men can too be good parents. I think you should be grateful that he is trying and he is also concerned that he may need help. Would you rather like that he doesn't care? No one is an expert in all situations Asperger. It is commendable that he educates himself. You asked him to join the group. If he does, he will be able to read your posts. I would think twice before I go ahead and bad-mouth him. From: "" <jenniferhermanski@...> Sender: Date: Tue, 15 Feb 2011 19:23:25 -0000 < > Reply Subject: ( ) The phone call So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he thinks reading those books will make it easy. Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think?Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the intelligence of a college grad. I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon but then I remind myself "It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn." That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live with my decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I think you made the right decision atleast he willing to read to get information i think its a good start From: <jenniferhermanski@...>Subject: ( ) The phone call Date: Tuesday, February 15, 2011, 7:23 PM So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he thinks reading those books will make it easy. Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think? Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the intelligence of a college grad. I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon but then I remind myself "It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn." That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live with my decision. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 But having read the books he'll at least know what to expect and maybe how to handle it. I keep reminding my husband it would be easier on him if he read a book so knew what to expect and therefore was better able to handle it On 2/15/11, <jenniferhermanski@...> wrote: > So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just > went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal > with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he > thinks reading those books will make it easy. > Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his > room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. > He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think? > Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his > life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute > little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social > maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the > intelligence of a college grad. > I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon > but then I remind myself " It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn. " > That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live > with my decision. > > > -- Sent from my mobile device -mommy to Emma, Becca, , , , and Leah Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 OMG I wish my ex would just read the BACK of the books I send him! My son has HFA and SPD and my ex is convinced it's my fault. In fact he thinks that so much he has filed for custody. My son has been dx by 3 different dr.s and it's still all my fault. My ex lives 2000 miles away, sees the kids every few months for a few days, and he's the expert. It is a bit laughable that reading 3 books makes him know how to do this, but we know better. Then again...I would like to think your ex is at least trying! TS In a message dated 2/15/2011 3:13:19 P.M. Central Standard Time, jenniferhermanski@... writes: I live in California and his father lives in Florida. I plan on setting up a special e mail address to stay in touch with my son and my ex>> Oh, how hard that decision must have been for you! I find myself thinking that NO ONE can take care of my kiddos better than me because I know them so well! I hate to say that I think that that kind of thinking applies to my hubby too, but I think it does sometimes (not always, because he is good with them). I'm sure it's hard for all of us to "let go" at times. But, I guess at some point we have to. Right? I guess I feel like I'm the only one in the whole world that "get's it" sometimes when confronted with the school saying that they aren't equipped to deal with my son and the stares and glares of other parents that I've gotten forever and all that other stuff. It's so easy to think that I'm all alone (or that we are all alone) in this whole thing. That's one of the reasons for this group! I love when I read posts that I myself could have written! > > I am happy for you that you have an ex that will make some kind of effort with your child! I'm sure he'll learn real quick that reading a book and living aren't really the same thing, but at least there was some effort there. Does he live far away from you? Will you still be able to see ? How long does he get for? I hope that you can find some time for yourself while he's away! You deserve it!! Hugs!> > Beth> > ( ) The phone call> > > > So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he thinks reading those books will make it easy. > Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. > He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think?> Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the intelligence of a college grad. > I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon but then I remind myself "It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn." That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live with my decision.> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 Honestly, at least he's reading up on it, and asking stupid questions. The only truely stupid questions are those that are not asked. Adam's father can't even pronounce the word Asperger's, much less knowing anything about it.FawnFrom: chris Dunn <christineshello@...> Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 6:12:47 PMSubject: Re: ( ) The phone call People make huge mistakes sometimes, but is up to us to look forward and give your son's father a chance to be in your son's life, is for your own son's benefit. The more people love your son, the better he will feel. Just my humble opinion. "Resentment is a poison we drink, thinking it will kill somebody else" I truly believe on this.From: <jenniferhermanski@...> Sent: Tue, February 15, 2011 4:11:25 PMSubject: Re: ( ) The phone call I guess the name calling stems from the fact that he abandoned his child for 12 years (left me when I was pregnant and denied that was his) and now suddenly he buys a few books and thinks it will make him an expert > > Sounds to me like he's trying. Not sure why you feel the need to call him a name? Help him understand your son. Be on his team so you two can do this together. > Sent via BlackBerry by AT & T > > ( ) The phone call > > So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he thinks reading those books will make it easy. > Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. > He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think? > Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the intelligence of a college grad. > I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon but then I remind myself "It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn." That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live with my decision. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I have to say, my ex-h would never have read a book (even now). But when I think about it, he didn't like to read books. You think that is it with some dads? We moms are more likely to read for enjoyment too, but dads don't, so reading a book on Aspergers/autism has no interest? (they'd rather us just tell them...) Though I do know men who read, fiction and nonfiction. > > I agree, I have those voices in my head a lot, so is not alone > there. I am glad she posted an update today, I as well, was having a Dad issue > today. only the opposite, my son's Dad will not go and buy the books to > read, he excuse is that reading takes to long, guess he would rather receive > the info through a mindmeld, LOL. I love this group, it helps me keep my > sanity when it has been one of those days. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 15, 2011 Report Share Posted February 15, 2011 I give the two of them till August or so before they either cant stand one another and is sent back to me OR he will love it and decide to make florida his home. I worry about how my son will react to his new step siblings and step mother. And how will s behaviors affect dads new marriage. Will step mom be able to cope with her husbands time being consumed by his aspie son? for that matter, how many of you parents here are single? Do you think the challenges of raising a special needs child contributed to your divorce or separation? > > > > So I just got a call from s father. He wants to tell me how he just went out and bought three books on AS and he now feels well prepared to deal with the challenges of raising him. Well I am ROFLMAO! It's cute that he thinks reading those books will make it easy. > > Then he has all these questions for me. So does he know how to clean his room? I say, well of course he does. He's 12. > > He asks, does he mind? I say, well he's got AS and ODD. What do you think? > > Oh Boy! My ex has no clue how challenging the next year or so of his life is going to be. He talks about raising as if was a cute little five year old. What he doesn't get is that has the social maturity of a five year old, the hormones of a 12 year old and the intelligence of a college grad. > > I feel awful about sending my son to live with such a clueless buffoon but then I remind myself " It's his turn, it's his turn, it's his turn. " That has become the phrase that gets me through the day and helps me live with my decision. > > > bbbbbbbbbbbbbdhytrsgh Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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