Need HELP - Daughter Sexually Abused

July 8, 2009

I don't know where to begin. My daughter has a list of diagnosis' but

Asperger's would probably be the best one to describe her. She is 16 years old.

I just found out that my daughter has been sexually active for the past nine

months. She didn't say yes to the boy but she didn't say no. She didn't touch

him but allowed him to do things to her. We have her in therapy and yesterday

was our first session regarding this issue. The therapist said she has been

" sexually abused " for the past nine months. I don't understand how this

happened. I found out two week ago and immediately pulled all the psychiatrists

reports to see if I could put a timeline together. She was very depressed and

her anxiety was bad this year. We had a number of reasons why. She began to cut

herself but thought it was due to a change in medication. Now we find this out.

In all the reports, she says she feels like we are " smoothering " her by not

allowing her to be more independence. This all happened at the school when she

stayed for different clubs and meetings. If she isn't safe at school, where will

she ever be safe. How can I allow her more freedom when things like this happen.

I've talked to my daughter about sex and her body, many, many times. We have

always been very open. How could I not have known this was going on. I'm

struggling with the idea of pursuing this because the boy involved is pretty

much as socially inapt as she is but my daughter said he has multiple

personalities and she was afraid he would get angry. She became numb and allowed

him to so she could keep his friendship.

Does anyone have any advice? I'm just tearing myself up inside and want to help

her but she is slipping into a dark hole now.

Helpless

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