Re: Please Share Your Coping Strategies

[Guest guest]

I'm curious to know why you are stopping the medications when they seem to help your son so much. I guess I look at it as denying a child what he/she needs when medications are removed in such a manner, like taking a diabetic's insulin away. I understand not wanting to have a child on medication, but if the medications help isn't it worth it to cope with the side effects?Of course that is MY opinion, which doesn't mean it should be anyone else's.PattiFrom: cmt263 <gina9431@...> Sent: Wed, December 8, 2010 9:37:59 AMSubject: ( ) Please Share Your Coping Strategies

We have decided to take my son off meds as he has too many side effects. We stopped meds as of Friday and have a follow up appt with the doc tomorrow. I may talk about going the Zoloft route, as this is the only other class of drugs we have not tried. The biggest issue with my son is his mood. He tends to be very negative and down all the time. When this happens, he tends to act ridiculous. He will say he hates things, wvwn when he does not. He will be rude to others, hit, talk about dying, and so on. When he is in a positive mood (as he has been on the meds), he is so much more cooperative, reasonable, and pleasant. Not sure how to get him to this place without medsN but would love any advise.

I am also looking for advise on how to deal with things patiently. Since we stopped meds, I am already seeing the behaviors return and I have a hard time dealing with it. I am a bit of a perfectionist myself, which clashes with his "everything revolves around me" attitude. When he is saying ridiculous things or acting like a spoiled brat, I quickly lose patients. How do you deal with this? I have been on Lexaporo for years, but stopped taking it months ago. I really do not want to go back on the meds, but have in the past as I feel I am a better mother to my ds when I am on the meds. I would love any suggestions or tips on how you deal. Are there any vitamins or alternatives that help you. I try to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep, but this doesn't do it for me....

[Guest guest]

Hello, I am new to the site. My daughter age 23 is going thru the process of being diagnoised with ASP. Like so many parents I thought was just a bit excentric as a child but as she got older these unique behaviors cause her great distress and dysfunction. She has the whole host of additional issues that go along with having ASP, social phobia, anxity/depression, OCD, Sensory issues, and ADD. We just moved so she will start with a new therapist that specializes in ASP. was just given a battery of psych tests and we are waiting for those results as well. One issue that is really disturbing is 's lack of memory. Short term experiences do not make it into her long term memory. Have others of you out there experienced this with your Aspie? I believe her brain is shutting out things due to overstimulation. She really does best in a quiet, well organized routine environment. OK that is not realistic but wow the memory

issues are bad. Let me know your thoughts, please. Thanks in advance.

~ Cheryl

From: cmt263 <gina9431@...> Sent: Wed, December 8, 2010 10:37:59 AMSubject: ( ) Please Share Your Coping Strategies

We have decided to take my son off meds as he has too many side effects. We stopped meds as of Friday and have a follow up appt with the doc tomorrow. I may talk about going the Zoloft route, as this is the only other class of drugs we have not tried. The biggest issue with my son is his mood. He tends to be very negative and down all the time. When this happens, he tends to act ridiculous. He will say he hates things, wvwn when he does not. He will be rude to others, hit, talk about dying, and so on. When he is in a positive mood (as he has been on the meds), he is so much more cooperative, reasonable, and pleasant. Not sure how to get him to this place without medsN but would love any advise.I am also looking for advise on how to deal with things patiently. Since we stopped meds, I am already seeing the behaviors return and I have a hard time dealing with it. I am a bit of a perfectionist myself, which clashes with his "everything revolves

around me" attitude. When he is saying ridiculous things or acting like a spoiled brat, I quickly lose patients. How do you deal with this? I have been on Lexaporo for years, but stopped taking it months ago. I really do not want to go back on the meds, but have in the past as I feel I am a better mother to my ds when I am on the meds. I would love any suggestions or tips on how you deal. Are there any vitamins or alternatives that help you. I try to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep, but this doesn't do it for me....

[Guest guest]

I would be willing to deal with side effects if they were not so severe. He has

urinary incontinence and has also been having bowel accidents. I was told the

urine issues are a side effect, not yet sure on the other issue. My son is 9

and has never had theses issues before. He also has a history of facial tics

(which started with Concerta a few years ago). So, some meds have made the tics

worse. The last med has a side effect of muscle stiffness...and of course he

experienced it (seems like he gets them all, even at extremely low doses). His

right arm would fling out and straighten up, almost like he was having a

siezure...very freaky! He has also gained quite a bit of weight from the

Abilify and Risperdal.

Then there is the factor of his father. We are divorced and his father is not

really on board with meds. He claims he has no issues at home with our son...of

course he is the Disneyland Dad who requires nothing of our son. He doesn't

even make him shower, brush his teeth, or do homework. My son is happy as long

as he gets to do what he wants to do, but that obviously is not how the world

works...especially at school!

Anyway, Dad starts saying things about long term side effects and how he doesn't

think ds needs meds.....and I start feeling guilty. I start feeling like I am

medicating him for my own sanity...because I have no patience with the behavior.

I just want ds to be happy, but feel so guilty medicating my child!

>

> I'm curious to know why you are stopping the medications when they seem to

help

> your son so much. I guess I look at it as denying a child what he/she needs

> when medications are removed in such a manner, like taking a diabetic's

insulin

> away. I understand not wanting to have a child on medication, but if the

> medications help isn't it worth it to cope with the side effects?

>

> Of course that is MY opinion, which doesn't mean it should be anyone else's.

>

> Patti

>

>

>

>

>

> ________________________________

> From: cmt263 <gina9431@...>

>

> Sent: Wed, December 8, 2010 9:37:59 AM

> Subject: ( ) Please Share Your Coping Strategies

>

>

> We have decided to take my son off meds as he has too many side effects. We

> stopped meds as of Friday and have a follow up appt with the doc tomorrow. I

> may talk about going the Zoloft route, as this is the only other class of

drugs

> we have not tried. The biggest issue with my son is his mood. He tends to be

> very negative and down all the time. When this happens, he tends to act

> ridiculous. He will say he hates things, wvwn when he does not. He will be

> rude to others, hit, talk about dying, and so on. When he is in a positive

mood

> (as he has been on the meds), he is so much more cooperative, reasonable, and

> pleasant. Not sure how to get him to this place without medsN but would love

> any advise.

>

> I am also looking for advise on how to deal with things patiently. Since we

> stopped meds, I am already seeing the behaviors return and I have a hard time

> dealing with it. I am a bit of a perfectionist myself, which clashes with his

> " everything revolves around me " attitude. When he is saying ridiculous things

> or acting like a spoiled brat, I quickly lose patients. How do you deal with

> this? I have been on Lexaporo for years, but stopped taking it months ago. I

> really do not want to go back on the meds, but have in the past as I feel I am

a

> better mother to my ds when I am on the meds. I would love any suggestions or

> tips on how you deal. Are there any vitamins or alternatives that help you.

I

> try to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep, but this doesn't do it for

> me....

>

[Guest guest]

Oh yeah(!), I know this well. I have the spouse who thinks that my daughter is fine and no meds are needed. Don't giove into that emotional guilt!! That is a dominence mechanism. Your son's med are not quite right for him if he is suffering the most dramatic of side affects. Keep hammering at the doctor for medications that help with your child's issues. The thing is that most Aspie kids need a cocktail of meds in addition to the talk therapy and behavioral therapy. So it takes a while to find the combo that works best. You as his mom really can see what is going on better than others, so follow your gut and heart.

~ Cheryl

From: cmt263 <gina9431@...> Sent: Wed, December 8, 2010 11:58:10 AMSubject: ( ) Re: Please Share Your Coping Strategies

I would be willing to deal with side effects if they were not so severe. He has urinary incontinence and has also been having bowel accidents. I was told the urine issues are a side effect, not yet sure on the other issue. My son is 9 and has never had theses issues before. He also has a history of facial tics (which started with Concerta a few years ago). So, some meds have made the tics worse. The last med has a side effect of muscle stiffness...and of course he experienced it (seems like he gets them all, even at extremely low doses). His right arm would fling out and straighten up, almost like he was having a siezure...very freaky! He has also gained quite a bit of weight from the Abilify and Risperdal. Then there is the factor of his father. We are divorced and his father is not really on board with meds. He claims he has no issues at home with our son...of course he is the Disneyland Dad who requires nothing of our son. He doesn't even

make him shower, brush his teeth, or do homework. My son is happy as long as he gets to do what he wants to do, but that obviously is not how the world works...especially at school!Anyway, Dad starts saying things about long term side effects and how he doesn't think ds needs meds.....and I start feeling guilty. I start feeling like I am medicating him for my own sanity...because I have no patience with the behavior.I just want ds to be happy, but feel so guilty medicating my child!>> I'm curious to know why you are stopping the medications when they seem to help > your son so much. I guess I look at it as denying a child what he/she needs > when medications are removed in such a manner, like

taking a diabetic's insulin > away. I understand not wanting to have a child on medication, but if the > medications help isn't it worth it to cope with the side effects?> > Of course that is MY opinion, which doesn't mean it should be anyone else's.> > Patti> > > > > > ________________________________> From: cmt263 <gina9431@...>> > Sent: Wed, December 8, 2010 9:37:59 AM> Subject: ( ) Please Share Your Coping Strategies> > > We have decided to take my son off meds as he has too many side effects. We > stopped meds as of Friday and have a follow up appt with the doc tomorrow. I > may talk about going the Zoloft route, as

this is the only other class of drugs > we have not tried. The biggest issue with my son is his mood. He tends to be > very negative and down all the time. When this happens, he tends to act > ridiculous. He will say he hates things, wvwn when he does not. He will be > rude to others, hit, talk about dying, and so on. When he is in a positive mood > (as he has been on the meds), he is so much more cooperative, reasonable, and > pleasant. Not sure how to get him to this place without medsN but would love > any advise.> > I am also looking for advise on how to deal with things patiently. Since we > stopped meds, I am already seeing the behaviors return and I have a hard time > dealing with it. I am a bit of a perfectionist myself, which clashes with his > "everything revolves around me" attitude. When he is saying ridiculous things > or acting like a spoiled brat, I

quickly lose patients. How do you deal with > this? I have been on Lexaporo for years, but stopped taking it months ago. I > really do not want to go back on the meds, but have in the past as I feel I am a > better mother to my ds when I am on the meds. I would love any suggestions or > tips on how you deal. Are there any vitamins or alternatives that help you. I > try to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep, but this doesn't do it for > me....>

[Guest guest]

I use to feel the same way about meds. Before my oldest son was diagnosed with ADHD I used to be ignorant about meds and how they can help. I used to say that I would never put my child on meds. Well when I gave in and decided to try it and saw the improvement in my son's ability to cope and make straight As I changed my perspective. The doctor back then explained it to me like this..."if your son needed glasses to see properly, would you not provide them for him?" to which I obviously answered "yes". He said, "well medications are like glasses in that they are a tool to help improve the quality of your child's life. With the glasses he can see better and with medications he can function better. Medications are a tool to improve the quality of your child's life." And he was right. That son will now be 23 this month and is in the Army.

So when my youngest, now 13, was diagnosed with Asperger's I had no hesitation to try medications when needed. We've been back and forth to the drawing board on meds. Trying to find the right ones and the right dosage takes time and patience but it's worth it for me for my son to have a better quality of life than when he is not taking them. Some people find natural remedies that help like restrictive diets and suppliments. You might want to try this yourself to see if it works for your son. But I would never feel guilty if I were you for wanting to give your son a tool to improve his ability to function and cope.

Some people might want to critise or frown on meds, but I'd ask them to walk a mile in any one of our children's shoes first before I'd take them seriously. Do what YOU think is right for your son. The rest is just "food for thought". You know your son best.

Hope you find what is right for you and your son. Good luck and <<hugs>>!ne

From: cmt263 <gina9431@...>Subject: ( ) Please Share Your Coping Strategies Date: Wednesday, December 8, 2010, 10:37 AM

We have decided to take my son off meds as he has too many side effects. We stopped meds as of Friday and have a follow up appt with the doc tomorrow. I may talk about going the Zoloft route, as this is the only other class of drugs we have not tried. The biggest issue with my son is his mood. He tends to be very negative and down all the time. When this happens, he tends to act ridiculous. He will say he hates things, wvwn when he does not. He will be rude to others, hit, talk about dying, and so on. When he is in a positive mood (as he has been on the meds), he is so much more cooperative, reasonable, and pleasant. Not sure how to get him to this place without medsN but would love any advise.I am also looking for advise on how to deal with things patiently. Since we stopped meds, I am already seeing the behaviors return and I have a hard time dealing with it. I am a bit of a perfectionist myself, which clashes with his "everything revolves

around me" attitude. When he is saying ridiculous things or acting like a spoiled brat, I quickly lose patients. How do you deal with this? I have been on Lexaporo for years, but stopped taking it months ago. I really do not want to go back on the meds, but have in the past as I feel I am a better mother to my ds when I am on the meds. I would love any suggestions or tips on how you deal. Are there any vitamins or alternatives that help you. I try to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep, but this doesn't do it for me....

[Guest guest]

I come from an island where natural medicine is used for economic and cultural reasons. Most medicines come from nature. I still use my grandmother remedies for several stuffs. My mother is a very well respected healer in my country.

When my sister graduated from medical school, she took my mother to help her at the clinic that she opened for the needed people.

My sister uses prescription medicine and educate the people about it. She took my mother in as an strategy to cure people. My country is very poor so my sister has learned from my mother natural medicine to use when people can not afford prescription...

Sometimes I sent medical supplies to the clinic and medicine I buy over the counter to say thank you to the fact that I am very fortunate I live in America.

It was hard for me to accept the fact that my daugther will never get better without the medicine. Reality slapped me on the face and I realized that my daugther was not getting better without medicine. So I put her on medicine..

We put up with terrible side effects, but finally she is stable.

I know it is a hard decision to have children put on medicine so young, but until a cure be found for autism , mental illness and epilepsy, we do not have a choice. We can choose no to give them medicine and see them suffer for life. We can choose give them medicine and hope the medicine will work out....There is not a perfect solution. I wish you the best...

( ) Please Share Your Coping Strategies Date: Wednesday, December 8, 2010, 10:37 AM We have decided to take my son off meds as he has too many side effects. We stopped meds as of Friday and have a follow up appt with the doc tomorrow. I may talk about going the Zoloft route, as this is the only other class of drugs we have not tried. The biggest issue with my son is his mood. He tends to be very negative and down all the time. When this happens, he tends to act ridiculous. He will say he hates things, wvwn when he does not. He will be rude to others, hit, talk about dying, and so on. When he is in a positive mood (as he has been on the meds), he is so much more cooperative, reasonable, and pleasant. Not sure how to get him to this place without medsN but would love any advise.I am also looking for advise on how to deal with things patiently. Since we stopped meds, I am already seeing the behaviors return and I have a hard time dealing with it. I am a bit of a perfectionist myself, which clashes with his "everything revolves around me" attitude. When he is saying ridiculous things or acting like a spoiled brat, I quickly lose patients. How do you deal with this? I have been on Lexaporo for years, but stopped taking it months ago. I really do not want to go back on the meds, but have in the past as I feel I am a better mother to my ds when I am on the meds. I would love any suggestions or tips on how you deal. Are there any vitamins or alternatives that help you. I try to exercise, eat right, and get enough sleep, but this doesn't do it for me....