Guest guest Posted January 3, 2008 Report Share Posted January 3, 2008 This is great! I especially like the English flavor! Barb (who spent her elementary years in a beloved British school!) Fwd: [ ] Merry Christmas - read lightheartedly In a message dated 03/01/2008 19:11:47 GMT Standard Time, darekylie@... writes: MERRY CHRISTMAS TO MUMS OF AUTISTIC CHILDREN Ok so you have to do the Christmas shopping, you have your list, you know its going to hurt more than just your purse, and you know you should've done it either online or in July when there is less people, music and decorations, around, but you didn't and it's a week before Christmas. Grit your teeth and get your child dressed and toothbrushed. You've been telling them for days you are going to Kmart, you've, reiretated the list to them and why you are going over and over again, he is actually excited (the bittersweet sensory experience it is). Into the carpark 10 minutes before the centre opens, to both ensure a carpark and less people. Not so, half the carparks are full already, well hopefully they're all understanding people, because they're in for an experience they didn't expect. Grab a trolley so you can strap him in, you want to be able to choose presents and not have to drop them all and search the carpark for bodies, or drag a screaming child out from under the shop shelves. The whole time bribing him with the promise of a fruit salad at the end, only to have to do it all again tomorrow. Ok so convinced that sitting in the trolley will get him a fruit salad for now he is placated, you wheel him into the centre amoungst the people, yelling happily aaaaah over the bumpy bitumen, and the " whats that smell " `s past every shop on the way to the department store, at least ten decibles louder than than anything else in the centre. So far so good. The first ten minutes goes well, you race in quickly past the people milling in and head for the toy section. Deciding between a my little pony and a barbie you turn around to see the trolley gone and your child in the next aisle looking at spiderman webshooters, (arms make excellent compromise for being in a trolley – god I hope he hasn't run down any little old ladies), pushing the trolley away to the next thing on the list, it begins……. " I want webshooters " " I want webshooters " <WBR>, " theyre for bigger boy of his games are marked 6+ and he knows it (hes 3), its pointless, the volume escalated " I want. I want . I want " , not to metion the kicking and biting, attempts to pull the trolley back to the blessed webshooters using the shelving and screaming " youre and idiot mum " , (reminds me of the girl on Willy Wonkas chocolate factory, who turns into a blue berry). People shake their heads assuming a spolit child and bad mothering, ahhh if only they knew, anyway you need him to shut up before someone calls the police so you grab a small superman and he locks onto that and you get a little more shopping done. To the checkout, sitting in the trolley yelling " hurry up mum somebodys coming " , `yes they have to line up too " , I explain. And this is always when it gets louder, it begins with smelling evey impulse item at the counter, then moves onto the trying to hide behind his hands which people find cute until he moves onto screaming " somebodys looking at me mum, lets get out of here, MUUUUM MUUUUM YOURE NOT LISTENING TO ME SOMEBODYS LOOKING AT ME " , which, truthfully I find a little bemusing, as people who smile and try and say hello get the fright of their lives, I'm busy waving superman under his nose to focus on, while the line up is waiting for me to unload my trolley. Pushing against the trolley, which is desperately trying to escape the counter, and tickling for distraction (I thank god he is ticklish), whilst trying to listen to the cashier who is bewildered at the irrational behaviour, at least you know you're on your way out of the place. In the car, perfect child, maybe I should film it so the shopping centre can play it over the cameras while we are there and I can say " see he isn't like this all the time " . Truthfully its better than last year tho, which involved screaming " aaaah, aaaaah aaaaaah " at top volume the minute we walked into the centre until the moment we left. Get home and make a coffee while he is rolling in an unravelled roll of Christmas paper, using the sticky tape to stick himself up and make a present out of himself. Sitting down with a coffee, I think, oh hell I forgot toilet paper " nnnnnnoooooooooo " oh hell I forgot toilet can use the Christmas paper (hehehe). Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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