Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 In a message dated 5/16/2001 12:59:33 PM Pacific Daylight Time, lls@... writes: > While not making any judgment about the religious aspect--I see this is an > excellent opportunity for you and your husband to help build more > understanding adults as the boys grow. I tried with cub scouts and everyone would agree with me then at the PAC Meeting they did the physical stuff anyway. Men seem to think the physical stuff makes the boys better people. jenny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 In a message dated 5/16/2001 1:16:33 PM Pacific Daylight Time, BILL@... writes: > By saying your children can never do these things you are ensuring that they > Your right about this but I do think it is safe to say my boys won't be walking on any 5 miles hikes... I would be safe in saying not any 1 miles hikes ... There is a kid with a heart problem in the church PAC he told me its very frustrating to him not to b able to participate. The not church PAC is more accommodating. I will talk to my husband after the next meeting. Maybe I can get a grip by then? jenny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 , I assume you are aware that there are PACS, DENS, and Boy Scout Troops that are specifically for " handicapped " In 1968, I helped organize a Troop for both mentally retarded and physically handicapped boys that were so severe they needed hospitalization. It was very successful. According to any scouting charter, activities are SUPPOSED to be structured to accommodate boys with limitations. True, not every boy can do every activity, but any activity can be modified. It is an excellent opportunity to help the more physically able boys to work with and accept boys with limitations. We even had wheelchair pushers that helped boys that could not walk complete a 5 mile hike.. It helps both the " handicapped " boy and the one that is not. The leader's responsibility is to help guide the others into acceptance of the one with limitations. Another thing we did was basketball and baseball. We put ALL boys in wheelchairs. They LOVED it. It was a " game " and at the same time made them realize about the limitations of others. While not making any judgment about the religious aspect--I see this is an excellent opportunity for you and your husband to help build more understanding adults as the boys grow. I say GO FOR IT. I have seen boys much worse off than you describe your children, be successful members of both " special " and regular Scouting groups. I fully agree that scouting helps build better " men " , but it is the Scouting leaders that do it. They are the " teachers " and " guides " . If they do the job good, it will at least help. If the adults do not make an effort, where will the boys learn? Make your own decision, but it is an opportunity. BTW, when my son was in Little League, his coach was a paraplegic in a wheelchair that was paralyzed from chest down. He started when the boys including his son were in T-Ball and moved up with the teams. They were champs every year. Then his wife and only child died in a tragic automobile accident. The next season, he was back. This man, paralyzed in his own early teens, taught the boys much more than baseball. ----- Original Message ----- From: Mommy2Adam@... Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 03:18 PM Subject: [] I need advice I'll make this short, I am really upset... A little history: In my church you get a *calling* that means the bishop asks you to help in some capacity. Not everyone has a *Calling* at the same time. It is suposed to be done by prayer and inspiration. A few years ago my calling was Cub Scouts Den Mom. I did not like the way the PAC ran, it was very physical. They did lots of sports competitions, wrestling and running. Spencer cried one meeting because again he was dead last again. They had a hopping contest. I changed PACs to an outside church PAC at the school that was not physical. Now we have a great PAC My husband takes Adam to every meeting. It's a family PAC. Lots of kids and parents. ( Spencer did quit the new PAC when they talked about hiking.) As for Adam he still likes it. Now my problem, My husband just got a *Calling* with the Boy Scouts at church. Mind you I do not go to church. I get to depressed there. Last night my husband came home and told me the Boy Scouts were planning a hiking trip. Like 5 miles. He was not thrilled. He is not a hiker either but he can do it. I didn't let him know how upset I was. This has really hurt me. Like a knife in my heart. My children will never be able to do these activities yet my husband has to go and plan for these activities for other kids. Another thing that bothers me is if you go to this church you are automatically scout. That is the young mens program. They feel Scouts makes them good men later in life. I won't comment on that one. I know my husband will quit this calling if I ask him to or if he knows that it hurts me but calling quitters are not looked at as responsible and I will not go to the bishop with this. It's very personal to me. Can anyone tell me if I am over reacting. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 , I do not think you are over reacting but I do think you need to share your feelings with your husband, keeping them bottled up is a big reason why you are so upset. I do not know your particular situation so I am only speculating here and by no means am I telling you how to raise your children, just some unsolicited advice, you are free to tell me tojump in the lake if you wish. By saying your children can never do these things you are ensuring that they never will. I work with Special Olympics when my time allows and it never ceases to amaze me as to what these kids CAN DO. I have lead hikes with 12 children in wheel chairs, granted the hikes were not too strenuous and we had plenty of support but we did it none the less. I will never play major league baseball but that does not stop me from playing catch with my son. If you can't talk to your bishop then talk to your husband or a close friend. Keeping it inside is only going to make it worse. Good luck and I hope this works out for you and your family. regards, BC ----- Original Message ----- From: <Mommy2Adam@...> < > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 12:18 PM Subject: [] I need advice > I'll make this short, I am really upset... > A little history: > In my church you get a *calling* that means the bishop asks you to help in > some capacity. Not everyone has a *Calling* at the same time. It is suposed > to be done by prayer and inspiration. > A few years ago my calling was Cub Scouts Den Mom. I did not like the way > the PAC ran, it was very physical. They did lots of sports competitions, > wrestling and running. Spencer cried one meeting because again he was dead > last again. They had a hopping contest. I changed PACs to an outside church > PAC at the school that was not physical. Now we have a great PAC My husband > takes Adam to every meeting. It's a family PAC. Lots of kids and parents. > Spencer did quit the new PAC when they talked about hiking.) As for Adam he > still likes it. > Now my problem, My husband just got a *Calling* with the Boy Scouts at > church. Mind you I do not go to church. I get to depressed there. > Last night my husband came home and told me the Boy Scouts were planning a > hiking trip. Like 5 miles. He was not thrilled. He is not a hiker either but > he can do it. I didn't let him know how upset I was. This has really hurt me. > Like a knife in my heart. > My children will never be able to do these activities yet my husband has to > go and plan for these activities for other kids. > Another thing that bothers me is if you go to this church you are > automatically scout. That is the young mens program. They feel Scouts makes > them good men later in life. I won't comment on that one. I know my husband > will quit this calling if I ask him to or if he knows that it hurts me but > calling quitters are not looked at as responsible and I will not go to the > bishop with this. It's very personal to me. > Can anyone tell me if I am over reacting. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 You said it better than I did Lamar! ----- Original Message ----- From: Lamar son <lls@...> < > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 12:57 PM Subject: Re: [] I need advice > , > I assume you are aware that there are PACS, DENS, and Boy Scout Troops that > are specifically for " handicapped " In 1968, I helped organize a Troop for > both mentally retarded and physically handicapped boys that were so severe > they needed hospitalization. It was very successful. According to any > scouting charter, activities are SUPPOSED to be structured to accommodate > boys with limitations. True, not every boy can do every activity, but any > activity can be modified. It is an excellent opportunity to help the more > physically able boys to work with and accept boys with limitations. We even > had wheelchair pushers that helped boys that could not walk complete a 5 > mile hike.. It helps both the " handicapped " boy and the one that is not. > The leader's responsibility is to help guide the others into acceptance of > the one with limitations. Another thing we did was basketball and baseball. > We put ALL boys in wheelchairs. They LOVED it. It was a " game " and at the > same time made them realize about the limitations of others. > > While not making any judgment about the religious aspect--I see this is an > excellent opportunity for you and your husband to help build more > understanding adults as the boys grow. I say GO FOR IT. I have seen boys > much worse off than you describe your children, be successful members of > both " special " and regular Scouting groups. I fully agree that scouting > helps build better " men " , but it is the Scouting leaders that do it. They > are the " teachers " and " guides " . If they do the job good, it will at least > help. If the adults do not make an effort, where will the boys learn? > > Make your own decision, but it is an opportunity. BTW, when my son was in > Little League, his coach was a paraplegic in a wheelchair that was paralyzed > from chest down. He started when the boys including his son were in T-Ball > and moved up with the teams. They were champs every year. Then his wife > and only child died in a tragic automobile accident. The next season, he > was back. This man, paralyzed in his own early teens, taught the boys much > more than baseball. > ----- Original Message ----- > From: Mommy2Adam@... > > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 03:18 PM > Subject: [] I need advice > > > I'll make this short, I am really upset... > A little history: > In my church you get a *calling* that means the bishop asks you to help in > some capacity. Not everyone has a *Calling* at the same time. It is > suposed > to be done by prayer and inspiration. > A few years ago my calling was Cub Scouts Den Mom. I did not like the way > the PAC ran, it was very physical. They did lots of sports competitions, > wrestling and running. Spencer cried one meeting because again he was dead > last again. They had a hopping contest. I changed PACs to an outside > church > PAC at the school that was not physical. Now we have a great PAC My > husband > takes Adam to every meeting. It's a family PAC. Lots of kids and > parents. ( > Spencer did quit the new PAC when they talked about hiking.) As for Adam > he > still likes it. > Now my problem, My husband just got a *Calling* with the Boy Scouts at > church. Mind you I do not go to church. I get to depressed there. > Last night my husband came home and told me the Boy Scouts were planning a > hiking trip. Like 5 miles. He was not thrilled. He is not a hiker either > but > he can do it. I didn't let him know how upset I was. This has really hurt > me. > Like a knife in my heart. > My children will never be able to do these activities yet my husband has > to > go and plan for these activities for other kids. > Another thing that bothers me is if you go to this church you are > automatically scout. That is the young mens program. They feel Scouts > makes > them good men later in life. I won't comment on that one. I know my > husband > will quit this calling if I ask him to or if he knows that it hurts me but > calling quitters are not looked at as responsible and I will not go to the > bishop with this. It's very personal to me. > Can anyone tell me if I am over reacting. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 16, 2001 Report Share Posted May 16, 2001 hang in there. ----- Original Message ----- From: <Mommy2Adam@...> < > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 2:07 PM Subject: Re: [] I need advice > In a message dated 5/16/2001 1:16:33 PM Pacific Daylight Time, > BILL@... writes: > > > > By saying your children can never do these things you are ensuring that they > > > > Your right about this but I do think it is safe to say my boys won't be > walking on any 5 miles hikes... > I would be safe in saying not any 1 miles hikes ... > There is a kid with a heart problem in the church PAC he told me its very > frustrating to him not to b able to participate. The not church PAC is more > accommodating. > I will talk to my husband after the next meeting. Maybe I can get a grip by > then? > jenny > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 Dear , You kind of sound like me, and I pray for you if that is true! We have a " thing " in our family. There's a joke about it, but it is unfortunately true with too many members of my family. It goes something like this: One night a man was driving down a lonely country road. It was really late and very dark. At some point he passed an old farm house. Kept on driving until disaster struck...he had a flat tire...and no JACK! Suddenly, however, he remembered the old farm house and decided that the farmer would surely be willing to help him out in his time of need, so he headed back down the road on foot. All the while he kept talking to himself, conjecturing out loud about how the farmer would react to a stranger banging on his door in the middle of the night, even though he had a legitimate need. The more he thought, the more agitated he became, thinking things like the old farmer would probably be upset at being woken up in the wee hours of the morning, but gosh darnit, he had a legitimate need and why in the world wouldn't he want to help him?...was there no more milk of human kindness left in the world? How could this guy actually have the nerve to get MAD at HIM...it's not like he planned it or anything, it was an accident for goodness sake. After long minutes of his loud " discussions " with himself he had finally arrived at the old farm house and the farmer, who had been wakened by all the loud arguing, was hanging out the upstairs window saying " What's all this yelling about? " Well, the traveler had worked himself into such a frenzy imagining the farmer's indignation that he just yelled up to the old guy, " Aw, you can just KEEP YOUR OLD JACK!!!!!!!!!!!!and turned around and walked off into the night. The point is, you can't let even small problems fester, because we are human and it's the most natural thing to do. It may not change your husband's view on things, especially if he feels that his calling is truly from God, but it could possibly change your heart. Who knows, your calling could be to be the best scout master's wife on the planet. I believe that everyone of us has a mission in life and that we are not always blessed to know what that mission is. The test to see if your mission in life has been accomplished is this: If you're still alive, it isn't! Talk to your sweet hubby. You should always know how the other person feels about something that will affect both of your lives, and they should always know how you feel. I too know how you feel about church. I miss it a lot, but because of pain suffered because of those with feet of clay, I am not yet ready to get back into it. I have, by no means, given up on God, and I'm really glad He hasn't given up on me. He can't stop now, I'm not finished yet! I pray for your peace of mind and heart. Remember, He is not the author of confusion. B. ----- Original Message ----- From: <Mommy2Adam@...> < > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 2:18 PM Subject: [] I need advice > I'll make this short, I am really upset... > A little history: > In my church you get a *calling* that means the bishop asks you to help in > some capacity. Not everyone has a *Calling* at the same time. It is suposed > to be done by prayer and inspiration. > A few years ago my calling was Cub Scouts Den Mom. I did not like the way > the PAC ran, it was very physical. They did lots of sports competitions, > wrestling and running. Spencer cried one meeting because again he was dead > last again. They had a hopping contest. I changed PACs to an outside church > PAC at the school that was not physical. Now we have a great PAC My husband > takes Adam to every meeting. It's a family PAC. Lots of kids and parents. > Spencer did quit the new PAC when they talked about hiking.) As for Adam he > still likes it. > Now my problem, My husband just got a *Calling* with the Boy Scouts at > church. Mind you I do not go to church. I get to depressed there. > Last night my husband came home and told me the Boy Scouts were planning a > hiking trip. Like 5 miles. He was not thrilled. He is not a hiker either but > he can do it. I didn't let him know how upset I was. This has really hurt me. > Like a knife in my heart. > My children will never be able to do these activities yet my husband has to > go and plan for these activities for other kids. > Another thing that bothers me is if you go to this church you are > automatically scout. That is the young mens program. They feel Scouts makes > them good men later in life. I won't comment on that one. I know my husband > will quit this calling if I ask him to or if he knows that it hurts me but > calling quitters are not looked at as responsible and I will not go to the > bishop with this. It's very personal to me. > Can anyone tell me if I am over reacting. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 , Lamar here, Excellent advise and food for thought. I always love to read your posts. ----- Original Message ----- From: Mr. Bracamontes Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 12:27 AM Subject: Re: [] I need advice Dear , You kind of sound like me, and I pray for you if that is true! We have a " thing " in our family. There's a joke about it, but it is unfortunately true with too many members of my family. It goes something like this: One night a man was driving down a lonely country road. It was really late and very dark. At some point he passed an old farm house. Kept on driving until disaster struck...he had a flat tire...and no JACK! Suddenly, however, he remembered the old farm house and decided that the farmer would surely be willing to help him out in his time of need, so he headed back down the road on foot. All the while he kept talking to himself, conjecturing out loud about how the farmer would react to a stranger banging on his door in the middle of the night, even though he had a legitimate need. The more he thought, the more agitated he became, thinking things like the old farmer would probably be upset at being woken up in the wee hours of the morning, but gosh darnit, he had a legitimate need and why in the world wouldn't he want to help him?...was there no more milk of human kindness left in the world? How could this guy actually have the nerve to get MAD at HIM...it's not like he planned it or anything, it was an accident for goodness sake. After long minutes of his loud " discussions " with himself he had finally arrived at the old farm house and the farmer, who had been wakened by all the loud arguing, was hanging out the upstairs window saying " What's all this yelling about? " Well, the traveler had worked himself into such a frenzy imagining the farmer's indignation that he just yelled up to the old guy, " Aw, you can just KEEP YOUR OLD JACK!!!!!!!!!!!!and turned around and walked off into the night. The point is, you can't let even small problems fester, because we are human and it's the most natural thing to do. It may not change your husband's view on things, especially if he feels that his calling is truly from God, but it could possibly change your heart. Who knows, your calling could be to be the best scout master's wife on the planet. I believe that everyone of us has a mission in life and that we are not always blessed to know what that mission is. The test to see if your mission in life has been accomplished is this: If you're still alive, it isn't! Talk to your sweet hubby. You should always know how the other person feels about something that will affect both of your lives, and they should always know how you feel. I too know how you feel about church. I miss it a lot, but because of pain suffered because of those with feet of clay, I am not yet ready to get back into it. I have, by no means, given up on God, and I'm really glad He hasn't given up on me. He can't stop now, I'm not finished yet! I pray for your peace of mind and heart. Remember, He is not the author of confusion. B. ----- Original Message ----- From: <Mommy2Adam@...> < > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 2:18 PM Subject: [] I need advice > I'll make this short, I am really upset... > A little history: > In my church you get a *calling* that means the bishop asks you to help in > some capacity. Not everyone has a *Calling* at the same time. It is suposed > to be done by prayer and inspiration. > A few years ago my calling was Cub Scouts Den Mom. I did not like the way > the PAC ran, it was very physical. They did lots of sports competitions, > wrestling and running. Spencer cried one meeting because again he was dead > last again. They had a hopping contest. I changed PACs to an outside church > PAC at the school that was not physical. Now we have a great PAC My husband > takes Adam to every meeting. It's a family PAC. Lots of kids and parents. > Spencer did quit the new PAC when they talked about hiking.) As for Adam he > still likes it. > Now my problem, My husband just got a *Calling* with the Boy Scouts at > church. Mind you I do not go to church. I get to depressed there. > Last night my husband came home and told me the Boy Scouts were planning a > hiking trip. Like 5 miles. He was not thrilled. He is not a hiker either but > he can do it. I didn't let him know how upset I was. This has really hurt me. > Like a knife in my heart. > My children will never be able to do these activities yet my husband has to > go and plan for these activities for other kids. > Another thing that bothers me is if you go to this church you are > automatically scout. That is the young mens program. They feel Scouts makes > them good men later in life. I won't comment on that one. I know my husband > will quit this calling if I ask him to or if he knows that it hurts me but > calling quitters are not looked at as responsible and I will not go to the > bishop with this. It's very personal to me. > Can anyone tell me if I am over reacting. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 In a message dated 5/16/2001 9:50:34 PM Pacific Daylight Time, bracamontes@... writes: << Remember, He is not the author of confusion. B. >> great email, I am very confused. Church should be uplifting cept I get depressed and drug down. I told my husband how i was feeling about his boy scout calling. He told me it hurts him too. He does not think this is right for him. He said he doesn't think that scouts is even good for Adam. He said when they go about twice a week they do something physical and Adam gets upset because he is last at it all. It embarrasses Adam and hurts my husband. He said he wants to cry when he sees Adam hurt. He said he hates to add to my worry so he just dosen't say anything to me. I asked Adam and he said " well it's boring or it's fun or I hate it " . Thats my Adam. I thought for a while then I said Heck it's only scouts. I am now looking into 4-H.. We can get a bunny or 2.. Does anyone else have any ideas? I would like to get into a club that flies those radio control air planes or something fun like that. I want to build self esteem, skills a feeling of belonging and pride in them Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 Thanks you gave me great advice. Do you have a dress code at yur church? We do we have to wear dresses. I hate that! Just another reason why I feel bad about church. jenny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 17, 2001 Report Share Posted May 17, 2001 Thanks Lamar, You're a sweetie! B. ----- Original Message ----- From: Lamar son <lls@...> < > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 11:44 PM Subject: Re: [] I need advice > , > Lamar here, > Excellent advise and food for thought. I always love to read your posts. > ----- Original Message ----- > From: Mr. Bracamontes > > Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 12:27 AM > Subject: Re: [] I need advice > > > Dear , > You kind of sound like me, and I pray for you if that is true! We have a > " thing " in our family. There's a joke about it, but it is unfortunately > true with too many members of my family. It goes something like this: > One > night a man was driving down a lonely country road. It was really late > and > very dark. At some point he passed an old farm house. Kept on driving > until disaster struck...he had a flat tire...and no JACK! Suddenly, > however, he remembered the old farm house and decided that the farmer > would > surely be willing to help him out in his time of need, so he headed back > down the road on foot. All the while he kept talking to himself, > conjecturing out loud about how the farmer would react to a stranger > banging > on his door in the middle of the night, even though he had a legitimate > need. The more he thought, the more agitated he became, thinking things > like the old farmer would probably be upset at being woken up in the wee > hours of the morning, but gosh darnit, he had a legitimate need and why in > the world wouldn't he want to help him?...was there no more milk of human > kindness left in the world? How could this guy actually have the nerve to > get MAD at HIM...it's not like he planned it or anything, it was an > accident > for goodness sake. After long minutes of his loud " discussions " with > himself he had finally arrived at the old farm house and the farmer, who > had > been wakened by all the loud arguing, was hanging out the upstairs window > saying " What's all this yelling about? " Well, the traveler had worked > himself into such a frenzy imagining the farmer's indignation that he just > yelled up to the old guy, " Aw, you can just KEEP YOUR OLD > JACK!!!!!!!!!!!!and turned around and walked off into the night. The > point > is, you can't let even small problems fester, because we are human and > it's > the most natural thing to do. It may not change your husband's view on > things, especially if he feels that his calling is truly from God, but it > could possibly change your heart. Who knows, your calling could be to be > the > best scout master's wife on the planet. I believe that everyone of us has > a > mission in life and that we are not always blessed to know what that > mission > is. The test to see if your mission in life has been accomplished is > this: > If you're still alive, it isn't! Talk to your sweet hubby. You should > always know how the other person feels about something that will affect > both > of your lives, and they should always know how you feel. > I too know how you feel about church. I miss it a lot, but because of > pain > suffered because of those with feet of clay, I am not yet ready to get > back > into it. I have, by no means, given up on God, and I'm really glad He > hasn't > given up on me. He can't stop now, I'm not finished yet! I pray for your > peace of mind and heart. Remember, He is not the author of confusion. > B. > ----- Original Message ----- > From: <Mommy2Adam@...> > < > > Sent: Wednesday, May 16, 2001 2:18 PM > Subject: [] I need advice > > > > I'll make this short, I am really upset... > > A little history: > > In my church you get a *calling* that means the bishop asks you to help > in > > some capacity. Not everyone has a *Calling* at the same time. It is > suposed > > to be done by prayer and inspiration. > > A few years ago my calling was Cub Scouts Den Mom. I did not like the > way > > the PAC ran, it was very physical. They did lots of sports competitions, > > wrestling and running. Spencer cried one meeting because again he was > dead > > last again. They had a hopping contest. I changed PACs to an outside > church > > PAC at the school that was not physical. Now we have a great PAC My > husband > > takes Adam to every meeting. It's a family PAC. Lots of kids and > parents. > > > Spencer did quit the new PAC when they talked about hiking.) As for Adam > he > > still likes it. > > Now my problem, My husband just got a *Calling* with the Boy Scouts at > > church. Mind you I do not go to church. I get to depressed there. > > Last night my husband came home and told me the Boy Scouts were planning > a > > hiking trip. Like 5 miles. He was not thrilled. He is not a hiker either > but > > he can do it. I didn't let him know how upset I was. This has really > hurt > me. > > Like a knife in my heart. > > My children will never be able to do these activities yet my husband > has > to > > go and plan for these activities for other kids. > > Another thing that bothers me is if you go to this church you are > > automatically scout. That is the young mens program. They feel Scouts > makes > > them good men later in life. I won't comment on that one. I know my > husband > > will quit this calling if I ask him to or if he knows that it hurts me > but > > calling quitters are not looked at as responsible and I will not go to > the > > bishop with this. It's very personal to me. > > Can anyone tell me if I am over reacting. > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2001 Report Share Posted May 18, 2001 Dear , So glad you were able to talk with your hubby about your pain. As God judges the " INNER man " just remember, as Shakespere said: " To Thine Own Self Be True. " You have to do what is right for you and your family. Let no man (or woman) tell you to do what you feel, in your heart, is not right. Your most important responsibility is those sweet boys and you certainly sound like you are on the right track. ( I really wish these little bundles would arrive with instructions attached!. ) We just have to muddle through the best we can. I too have guilt problems when it comes to having my children in church. They miss it too and that makes me feel bad, so I try to make sure they don't miss out on too much. I'm trying to keep up on my daily reading so that I can answer any of their questions, and if I can't, we search together. They really love talking about it. And the younger ones have really developed a love of music so that keeps them pretty busy with extracurricular activities(school band) And, we have instituted Family Game Night. Sometimes, it's really hard to sit there for the duration of the game, get too cramped up, but it's definitely worth it. Thanks for giving me an opportunity to " talk " Sometimes, that's all we need! Take care of ALL your boys. You are Blessed! B. ----- Original Message ----- From: <Mommy2Adam@...> < > Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 11:05 AM Subject: Re: [] I need advice > In a message dated 5/16/2001 9:50:34 PM Pacific Daylight Time, > bracamontes@... writes: > > << Remember, He is not the author of confusion. > B. >> > great email, I am very confused. Church should be uplifting cept I get > depressed and drug down. > I told my husband how i was feeling about his boy scout calling. He told me > it hurts him too. He does not think this is right for him. He said he doesn't > think that scouts is even good for Adam. He said when they go about twice a > week they do something physical and Adam gets upset because he is last at it > all. It embarrasses Adam and hurts my husband. He said he wants to cry when > he sees Adam hurt. He said he hates to add to my worry so he just dosen't say > anything to me. I asked Adam and he said " well it's boring or it's fun or I > hate it " . Thats my Adam. I thought for a while then I said Heck it's only > scouts. I am now looking into 4-H.. We can get a bunny or 2.. Does anyone > else have any ideas? I would like to get into a club that flies those radio > control air planes or something fun like that. > I want to build self esteem, skills a feeling of belonging and pride in them > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2001 Report Share Posted May 18, 2001 Dear , I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a preacher for about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline preachin " " just ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to church is to get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to glorify the Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you will wear then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be spiritually fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up there and praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! ----- Original Message ----- From: <Mommy2Adam@...> < > Sent: Thursday, May 17, 2001 6:17 PM Subject: Re: [] I need advice > Thanks you gave me great advice. Do you have a dress code at yur church? > We do we have to wear dresses. I hate that! Just another reason why I feel > bad about church. > jenny > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2001 Report Share Posted May 18, 2001 > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a preacher for > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline preachin " " just > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to church is to > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to glorify the > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you will wear > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be spiritually > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up there and > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a dress code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an unspoken rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This was the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or the other how people dress... Lynn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 18, 2001 Report Share Posted May 18, 2001 Lynn, Lamar here, Then you must live in a very unusual area. In the southeast, dressy casual is accepted in probably less than half the churches. In most city churches men are expected to at least have on a tie if not a dress suit. Many churches have gotten somewhat more liberal about female dress and will allow slacks, but many frown on it. It is prohibited by some religions and some prohibit women to wear slacks anywhere. They utilize the Biblical scripture that a woman should not wear man's clothing. While not being judgmental, during Biblical times slacks or any sort of pants did not exist. Both men and women wore robes or a simple garment similar to a toga. The man's toga showed his degree of advancement in his work, society, or training. The apprentice wore a garment draped over his left shoulder leaving the right part of his chest exposed. The master wore a garment draped over his right shoulder leaving the left portion of his chest exposed. The male laborer wore a garment around his waist exposing both sides of the chest. The female wore a garment draped across BOTH shoulders that completely covered the chest. That was the historical form of dress for over 1000 years. The individual must determine how they interpret that passage if they are of the Christian faith. I do not know if similar passages are in the beliefs of non Christian religions, but if they are I have not heard of them. In any event, allowed or not, few females in my area wear slacks to church. My mother virtually stopped attending after she was in braces (that was before plastic AFO's were common) due to this. It was not prohibited, but she stood out like a sore thumb, being the only female in slacks. Ironically, when her CMT progressed even more, she could no longer easily manage slacks. She could not stand to pull them or even underwear up easily while dressing or for " nature calls " .. She reverted to wearing long full skirts and dresses and a slip. When she got to the point she was completely in a wheelchair and could not stand at all, she wore full skirts split in the back similar to a hospital gown and tucked the edges in. At any rate, by the time she was back in skirts or dresses, she could not transfer into a vehicle and virtually stopped going anywhere. Churches have gotten much more liberal in the last thirty years about dress, and I am glad to see it. Still many frown, or at least look down, on females wearing slacks to church. I know of almost no church where jeans would be appropriate especially for adults. As I said, I am glad to see some things evolving in many organized religions. At the same time I think most CMT'ers (and KNOW that I) like to dress in accordance with what the average person would be wearing to ANY activity even if there is no established " code " . I stand out enough as it is. I realize that many areas differ markedly in what is " acceptable " in dress and other things. In my area, any form of body piercing is virtually taboo, other than earrings for females. A child can not have them at all in school nor can they have a tattoo that shows. Yet in some areas eyebrow rings are very common, and even teachers have them. In the state of SC, tattoo shops are totally prohibited by law. Many have them but go out of state to get them. So a lot depends on where you live. I try to stay away from places jeans are not " OK " . ----- Original Message ----- From: uazcatsfan@... Sent: Friday, May 18, 2001 08:39 AM Subject: [] Re: I need advice > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a preacher for > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline preachin " " just > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to church is to > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to glorify the > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you will wear > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be spiritually > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up there and > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a dress code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an unspoken rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This was the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or the other how people dress... Lynn Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 19, 2001 Report Share Posted May 19, 2001 Lynn, I've actually been in churches that mailed all newcomers (as well as regular members) copies of the " recommended attire " for the season. This is not just a list of clothing that should be worn to church, but what should be worn at any time, in any given situation and was, of course, divided by the sexes, a separate list for each! However, if the fellowship in that church was good, we continued to go as long as we needed. We have often found ourselves in remote areas where we were lucky to find a church of any kind, and to find one in which your fellow countrymen worship was more than enough incentive for us to not " forsake the fellowshipping of the saints! " I do realize that a minister has a duty to teach his flock, but a shepard does not poke, prod, or yank his sheep, he merely leads (by example) and they follow, which is why God likened us to sheep, they are not particularly intelligent creatures and tend to " follow their leader. " I see " dress codes " in churches as a sort of prejudice. I have been to many churches where the unwritten rule was " attend to see and be seen. " And I have had enough of prejudice. Thank God He doesn't see me as fat or thin, black or white, dressy or casual. I have a " mixed " marriage. My husband is Hispanic, I am white. A large part of my family told me that I should be ashamed of myself when I told them that I was marrying a Mexican. Many of my cousins have since married Mexicans. One of my sisters has been divorced once and remarried. The other sister has divorced twice and remarried for the third time. In 11 days my husband and I will be celebrating our 25th wedding anniversary! The point is, God doesn't see him as a Mexican, or me as a white girl, He sees us as two halves of the same whole because he made us that way, and even though the world may see us worshipping God in blue jeans, HE doesn't, He only sees a repentitent and contrite heart! Life is just too short here on earth to be caught up in " dress codes! " My favorite preacher's wife (who, when we first met her wouldn't have even considered wearing pants, but after 5 years as a missionary in Athens, now wears shorts) once said " apply this to every situation if you are unsure what to do: In a hundred years, who will care? If you can't come up with one name, go with your heart! " Sorry, I didn't mean to preach. I have spent all of my life in church and now that I am not going anymore, I'm really fighting a spiritual battle within myself. Please feel free to tell me to jump in the lake, this venting was really more for me. B. ----- Original Message ----- From: <uazcatsfan@...> < > Sent: Friday, May 18, 2001 7:39 AM Subject: [] Re: I need advice > > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a > preacher for > > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline > preachin " " just > > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to > church is to > > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to > glorify the > > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you > will wear > > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be > spiritually > > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up > there and > > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! > > Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a dress > code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an unspoken > rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, > clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and > shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This was > the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) > > Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or the > other how people dress... > > Lynn > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2001 Report Share Posted May 22, 2001 Lamar, I do tend to forget that I live in a very laid back area of the country when it comes to clothing -- for example, someone out here (southern AZ) who wore shorts or jeans to the symphony wouldn't be particularly out of place. Some people do still dress up, but many don't. The symphony even ran a campaign at one point telling people they could and should dress casually. And some of the churches here do expect people to dress up -- they just weren't ones my family went to. (We've gone to Presbyterian, Lutheran, Methodist, and Unity churches mostly, plus two rather non- traditional non-denominational churches.) But my mom's the only one who goes regularly -- my dad stopped when it got too hard for him to stand during the parts of the service that required standing, though that never stopped his mom. I would think that part of the reason for the more relaxed dress codes out here is a concession to the loooong hot summers... Lynn > Lynn, > Lamar here, > > Then you must live in a very unusual area. In the southeast, dressy casual > is accepted in probably less than half the churches. In most city churches > men are expected to at least have on a tie if not a dress suit. Many > churches have gotten somewhat more liberal about female dress and will allow > slacks, but many frown on it. It is prohibited by some religions and some > prohibit women to wear slacks anywhere. They utilize the Biblical scripture > that a woman should not wear man's clothing. While not being judgmental, > during Biblical times slacks or any sort of pants did not exist. Both men > and women wore robes or a simple garment similar to a toga. The man's toga > showed his degree of advancement in his work, society, or training. The > apprentice wore a garment draped over his left shoulder leaving the right > part of his chest exposed. The master wore a garment draped over his right > shoulder leaving the left portion of his chest exposed. The male laborer > wore a garment around his waist exposing both sides of the chest. The > female wore a garment draped across BOTH shoulders that completely covered > the chest. That was the historical form of dress for over 1000 years. The > individual must determine how they interpret that passage if they are of the > Christian faith. I do not know if similar passages are in the beliefs of > non Christian religions, but if they are I have not heard of them. > > In any event, allowed or not, few females in my area wear slacks to church. > My mother virtually stopped attending after she was in braces (that was > before plastic AFO's were common) due to this. It was not prohibited, but > she stood out like a sore thumb, being the only female in slacks. > Ironically, when her CMT progressed even more, she could no longer easily > manage slacks. She could not stand to pull them or even underwear up easily > while dressing or for " nature calls " .. She reverted to wearing long full > skirts and dresses and a slip. When she got to the point she was completely > in a wheelchair and could not stand at all, she wore full skirts split in > the back similar to a hospital gown and tucked the edges in. At any rate, > by the time she was back in skirts or dresses, she could not transfer into a > vehicle and virtually stopped going anywhere. > > Churches have gotten much more liberal in the last thirty years about dress, > and I am glad to see it. Still many frown, or at least look down, on > females wearing slacks to church. I know of almost no church where jeans > would be appropriate especially for adults. > > As I said, I am glad to see some things evolving in many organized > religions. At the same time I think most CMT'ers (and KNOW that I) like to > dress in accordance with what the average person would be wearing to ANY > activity even if there is no established " code " . I stand out enough as it > is. > > I realize that many areas differ markedly in what is " acceptable " in dress > and other things. In my area, any form of body piercing is virtually taboo, > other than earrings for females. A child can not have them at all in school > nor can they have a tattoo that shows. Yet in some areas eyebrow rings are > very common, and even teachers have them. In the state of SC, tattoo shops > are totally prohibited by law. Many have them but go out of state to get > them. So a lot depends on where you live. I try to stay away from places > jeans are not " OK " . > ----- Original Message ----- > From: uazcatsfan@a... > @y... > Sent: Friday, May 18, 2001 08:39 AM > Subject: [] Re: I need advice > > > > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a > preacher for > > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline > preachin " " just > > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to > church is to > > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to > glorify the > > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you > will wear > > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be > spiritually > > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up > there and > > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! > > Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a dress > code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an unspoken > rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, > clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and > shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This was > the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) > > Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or the > other how people dress... > > Lynn > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2001 Report Share Posted May 22, 2001 Lynn, I assure you that south GA is hot. While I have never been to AZ, I understand the humidity is low. Here we often 100 with a near 100% humidity. It feels hotter here at 90 than in TX at 115. ----- Original Message ----- From: uazcatsfan@... Sent: Tuesday, May 22, 2001 02:51 AM Subject: [] Re: I need advice Lamar, I do tend to forget that I live in a very laid back area of the country when it comes to clothing -- for example, someone out here (southern AZ) who wore shorts or jeans to the symphony wouldn't be particularly out of place. Some people do still dress up, but many don't. The symphony even ran a campaign at one point telling people they could and should dress casually. And some of the churches here do expect people to dress up -- they just weren't ones my family went to. (We've gone to Presbyterian, Lutheran, Methodist, and Unity churches mostly, plus two rather non- traditional non-denominational churches.) But my mom's the only one who goes regularly -- my dad stopped when it got too hard for him to stand during the parts of the service that required standing, though that never stopped his mom. I would think that part of the reason for the more relaxed dress codes out here is a concession to the loooong hot summers... Lynn > Lynn, > Lamar here, > > Then you must live in a very unusual area. In the southeast, dressy casual > is accepted in probably less than half the churches. In most city churches > men are expected to at least have on a tie if not a dress suit. Many > churches have gotten somewhat more liberal about female dress and will allow > slacks, but many frown on it. It is prohibited by some religions and some > prohibit women to wear slacks anywhere. They utilize the Biblical scripture > that a woman should not wear man's clothing. While not being judgmental, > during Biblical times slacks or any sort of pants did not exist. Both men > and women wore robes or a simple garment similar to a toga. The man's toga > showed his degree of advancement in his work, society, or training. The > apprentice wore a garment draped over his left shoulder leaving the right > part of his chest exposed. The master wore a garment draped over his right > shoulder leaving the left portion of his chest exposed. The male laborer > wore a garment around his waist exposing both sides of the chest. The > female wore a garment draped across BOTH shoulders that completely covered > the chest. That was the historical form of dress for over 1000 years. The > individual must determine how they interpret that passage if they are of the > Christian faith. I do not know if similar passages are in the beliefs of > non Christian religions, but if they are I have not heard of them. > > In any event, allowed or not, few females in my area wear slacks to church. > My mother virtually stopped attending after she was in braces (that was > before plastic AFO's were common) due to this. It was not prohibited, but > she stood out like a sore thumb, being the only female in slacks. > Ironically, when her CMT progressed even more, she could no longer easily > manage slacks. She could not stand to pull them or even underwear up easily > while dressing or for " nature calls " .. She reverted to wearing long full > skirts and dresses and a slip. When she got to the point she was completely > in a wheelchair and could not stand at all, she wore full skirts split in > the back similar to a hospital gown and tucked the edges in. At any rate, > by the time she was back in skirts or dresses, she could not transfer into a > vehicle and virtually stopped going anywhere. > > Churches have gotten much more liberal in the last thirty years about dress, > and I am glad to see it. Still many frown, or at least look down, on > females wearing slacks to church. I know of almost no church where jeans > would be appropriate especially for adults. > > As I said, I am glad to see some things evolving in many organized > religions. At the same time I think most CMT'ers (and KNOW that I) like to > dress in accordance with what the average person would be wearing to ANY > activity even if there is no established " code " . I stand out enough as it > is. > > I realize that many areas differ markedly in what is " acceptable " in dress > and other things. In my area, any form of body piercing is virtually taboo, > other than earrings for females. A child can not have them at all in school > nor can they have a tattoo that shows. Yet in some areas eyebrow rings are > very common, and even teachers have them. In the state of SC, tattoo shops > are totally prohibited by law. Many have them but go out of state to get > them. So a lot depends on where you live. I try to stay away from places > jeans are not " OK " . > ----- Original Message ----- > From: uazcatsfan@a... > @y... > Sent: Friday, May 18, 2001 08:39 AM > Subject: [] Re: I need advice > > > > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a > preacher for > > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline > preachin " " just > > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to > church is to > > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to > glorify the > > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you > will wear > > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be > spiritually > > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up > there and > > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! > > Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a dress > code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an unspoken > rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, > clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and > shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This was > the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) > > Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or the > other how people dress... > > Lynn > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2001 Report Share Posted May 22, 2001 -----Original Message----- From: Lamar son <lls@...> < > Date: Tuesday, May 22, 2001 1:51 AM Subject: Re: [] Re: I need advice >>>>>Lamar, I've never been to GA, but have lived in LA and been to AZ. In AZ it was 110 and a dry heat, I loved it. Walked all over town, (several years ago). But in LA if it was 85 and high humidity I just mopped around dragging my feet unable to move and always dripping wet. Bet LA is a lot like GA. ~>Becky M. >Lynn, >I assure you that south GA is hot. While I have never been to AZ, I >understand the humidity is low. Here we often 100 with a near 100% >humidity. It feels hotter here at 90 than in TX at 115. > ----- Original Message ----- > From: uazcatsfan@... > > Sent: Tuesday, May 22, 2001 02:51 AM > Subject: [] Re: I need advice > > > Lamar, > > I do tend to forget that I live in a very laid back area of the > country when it comes to clothing -- for example, someone out here > (southern AZ) who wore shorts or jeans to the symphony wouldn't be > particularly out of place. Some people do still dress up, but many > don't. The symphony even ran a campaign at one point telling people > they could and should dress casually. > > And some of the churches here do expect people to dress up -- they > just weren't ones my family went to. (We've gone to Presbyterian, > Lutheran, Methodist, and Unity churches mostly, plus two rather non- > traditional non-denominational churches.) But my mom's the only one > who goes regularly -- my dad stopped when it got too hard for him to > stand during the parts of the service that required standing, though > that never stopped his mom. > > I would think that part of the reason for the more relaxed dress > codes out here is a concession to the loooong hot summers... > > Lynn > > > > > > Lynn, > > Lamar here, > > > > Then you must live in a very unusual area. In the southeast, > dressy casual > > is accepted in probably less than half the churches. In most city > churches > > men are expected to at least have on a tie if not a dress suit. > Many > > churches have gotten somewhat more liberal about female dress and > will allow > > slacks, but many frown on it. It is prohibited by some religions > and some > > prohibit women to wear slacks anywhere. They utilize the Biblical > scripture > > that a woman should not wear man's clothing. While not being > judgmental, > > during Biblical times slacks or any sort of pants did not exist. > Both men > > and women wore robes or a simple garment similar to a toga. The > man's toga > > showed his degree of advancement in his work, society, or > training. The > > apprentice wore a garment draped over his left shoulder leaving > the right > > part of his chest exposed. The master wore a garment draped over > his right > > shoulder leaving the left portion of his chest exposed. The male > laborer > > wore a garment around his waist exposing both sides of the chest. > The > > female wore a garment draped across BOTH shoulders that completely > covered > > the chest. That was the historical form of dress for over 1000 > years. The > > individual must determine how they interpret that passage if they > are of the > > Christian faith. I do not know if similar passages are in the > beliefs of > > non Christian religions, but if they are I have not heard of them. > > > > In any event, allowed or not, few females in my area wear slacks to > church. > > My mother virtually stopped attending after she was in braces (that > was > > before plastic AFO's were common) due to this. It was not > prohibited, but > > she stood out like a sore thumb, being the only female in slacks. > > Ironically, when her CMT progressed even more, she could no longer > easily > > manage slacks. She could not stand to pull them or even underwear > up easily > > while dressing or for " nature calls " .. She reverted to wearing > long full > > skirts and dresses and a slip. When she got to the point she was > completely > > in a wheelchair and could not stand at all, she wore full skirts > split in > > the back similar to a hospital gown and tucked the edges in. At > any rate, > > by the time she was back in skirts or dresses, she could not > transfer into a > > vehicle and virtually stopped going anywhere. > > > > Churches have gotten much more liberal in the last thirty years > about dress, > > and I am glad to see it. Still many frown, or at least look down, > on > > females wearing slacks to church. I know of almost no church where > jeans > > would be appropriate especially for adults. > > > > As I said, I am glad to see some things evolving in many organized > > religions. At the same time I think most CMT'ers (and KNOW that I) > like to > > dress in accordance with what the average person would be wearing > to ANY > > activity even if there is no established " code " . I stand out > enough as it > > is. > > > > I realize that many areas differ markedly in what is " acceptable " > in dress > > and other things. In my area, any form of body piercing is > virtually taboo, > > other than earrings for females. A child can not have them at all > in school > > nor can they have a tattoo that shows. Yet in some areas eyebrow > rings are > > very common, and even teachers have them. In the state of SC, > tattoo shops > > are totally prohibited by law. Many have them but go out of state > to get > > them. So a lot depends on where you live. I try to stay away from > places > > jeans are not " OK " . > > ----- Original Message ----- > > From: uazcatsfan@a... > > @y... > > Sent: Friday, May 18, 2001 08:39 AM > > Subject: [] Re: I need advice > > > > > > > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a > > preacher for > > > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline > > preachin " " just > > > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to > > church is to > > > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to > > glorify the > > > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you > > will wear > > > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be > > spiritually > > > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up > > there and > > > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! > > > > Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a > dress > > code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an > unspoken > > rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, > > clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and > > shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This > was > > the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) > > > > Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or > the > > other how people dress... > > > > Lynn > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2001 Report Share Posted May 22, 2001 Lamar, Well, twas a theory... And yes, the humidity is extremely low here most of the time, which does help take the edge of the heat. (I've never been in GA during the summer, but I've been in both Arkansas and Michigan when it was almost 100 with matching humidity, and it is harder to take than 110+ down here. So much for that theory...) The attitudes toward dress are very realaxed out here, though. I have a friend from Philly who says that's one of the things she likes best about AZ -- that she can dress casually most of the time and only get really dressed up when she feels like it. And I'm certainly glad for it. Given that there are only a very few styles of shoes I can wear without pain and that none of those are dressy, I can still manage to not stick out like a sore thumb most of the time. (Though I still kind of miss the dress sandals with the 4- inch heels I had in high school, even though I'd wind up flat on my face if I wore them now.) Lynn > Lynn, > I assure you that south GA is hot. While I have never been to AZ, I > understand the humidity is low. Here we often 100 with a near 100% > humidity. It feels hotter here at 90 than in TX at 115. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 22, 2001 Report Share Posted May 22, 2001 -----Original Message----- From: uazcatsfan@... <uazcatsfan@...> < > Date: Tuesday, May 22, 2001 1:46 AM Subject: [] Re: I need advice >>>>Lynn, I think the members of the churches here try to see who can out do who in dress! I've sat behind people who were discussing what so and so wore to church last sunday or that day, and couldn't she/he dress better for church at least! And with leg braces, its hard to find the right clothes and shoes. Makes one feel uncomfortable, ~>Becky M. >Lamar, > >I do tend to forget that I live in a very laid back area of the >country when it comes to clothing -- for example, someone out here >(southern AZ) who wore shorts or jeans to the symphony wouldn't be >particularly out of place. Some people do still dress up, but many >don't. The symphony even ran a campaign at one point telling people >they could and should dress casually. > >And some of the churches here do expect people to dress up -- they >just weren't ones my family went to. (We've gone to Presbyterian, >Lutheran, Methodist, and Unity churches mostly, plus two rather non- >traditional non-denominational churches.) But my mom's the only one >who goes regularly -- my dad stopped when it got too hard for him to >stand during the parts of the service that required standing, though >that never stopped his mom. > >I would think that part of the reason for the more relaxed dress >codes out here is a concession to the loooong hot summers... > >Lynn > > > > >> Lynn, >> Lamar here, >> >> Then you must live in a very unusual area. In the southeast, >dressy casual >> is accepted in probably less than half the churches. In most city >churches >> men are expected to at least have on a tie if not a dress suit. >Many >> churches have gotten somewhat more liberal about female dress and >will allow >> slacks, but many frown on it. It is prohibited by some religions >and some >> prohibit women to wear slacks anywhere. They utilize the Biblical >scripture >> that a woman should not wear man's clothing. While not being >judgmental, >> during Biblical times slacks or any sort of pants did not exist. >Both men >> and women wore robes or a simple garment similar to a toga. The >man's toga >> showed his degree of advancement in his work, society, or >training. The >> apprentice wore a garment draped over his left shoulder leaving >the right >> part of his chest exposed. The master wore a garment draped over >his right >> shoulder leaving the left portion of his chest exposed. The male >laborer >> wore a garment around his waist exposing both sides of the chest. >The >> female wore a garment draped across BOTH shoulders that completely >covered >> the chest. That was the historical form of dress for over 1000 >years. The >> individual must determine how they interpret that passage if they >are of the >> Christian faith. I do not know if similar passages are in the >beliefs of >> non Christian religions, but if they are I have not heard of them. >> >> In any event, allowed or not, few females in my area wear slacks to >church. >> My mother virtually stopped attending after she was in braces (that >was >> before plastic AFO's were common) due to this. It was not >prohibited, but >> she stood out like a sore thumb, being the only female in slacks. >> Ironically, when her CMT progressed even more, she could no longer >easily >> manage slacks. She could not stand to pull them or even underwear >up easily >> while dressing or for " nature calls " .. She reverted to wearing >long full >> skirts and dresses and a slip. When she got to the point she was >completely >> in a wheelchair and could not stand at all, she wore full skirts >split in >> the back similar to a hospital gown and tucked the edges in. At >any rate, >> by the time she was back in skirts or dresses, she could not >transfer into a >> vehicle and virtually stopped going anywhere. >> >> Churches have gotten much more liberal in the last thirty years >about dress, >> and I am glad to see it. Still many frown, or at least look down, >on >> females wearing slacks to church. I know of almost no church where >jeans >> would be appropriate especially for adults. >> >> As I said, I am glad to see some things evolving in many organized >> religions. At the same time I think most CMT'ers (and KNOW that I) >like to >> dress in accordance with what the average person would be wearing >to ANY >> activity even if there is no established " code " . I stand out >enough as it >> is. >> >> I realize that many areas differ markedly in what is " acceptable " >in dress >> and other things. In my area, any form of body piercing is >virtually taboo, >> other than earrings for females. A child can not have them at all >in school >> nor can they have a tattoo that shows. Yet in some areas eyebrow >rings are >> very common, and even teachers have them. In the state of SC, >tattoo shops >> are totally prohibited by law. Many have them but go out of state >to get >> them. So a lot depends on where you live. I try to stay away from >places >> jeans are not " OK " . >> ----- Original Message ----- >> From: uazcatsfan@a... >> @y... >> Sent: Friday, May 18, 2001 08:39 AM >> Subject: [] Re: I need advice >> >> >> > I'm sure most every church has a " dress code " but my Grandpa (a >> preacher for >> > about 50 years before he died) used to call it " clothesline >> preachin " " just >> > ignore them clothes 'till they dry! " The whole reason to go to >> church is to >> > get fed (can you eat in pants? spiritually speaking!) and to >> glorify the >> > Lord. If you give much thought to what you will eat or what you >> will wear >> > then you are wasting time and energy that could be used to be >> spiritually >> > fed and to glorify the Lord. Start a movement, honey. Git up >> there and >> > praise the Lord in your blue jeans!!!!! >> >> Actually, I don't think I've ever gone to a church that had a >dress >> code. The closest to a dress code I ever encountered was an >unspoken >> rule of " the dressier side of casual " -- as long as it was neat, >> clean, unripped, and reasonably modest, it was okay. Jeans and >> shorts weren't considered ideal, but they were tolerated. (This >was >> the Lutheran church I went to between age eight and age fifteen.) >> >> Every church I've been in since, though, hasn't cared one way or >the >> other how people dress... >> >> Lynn >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 27, 2003 Report Share Posted June 27, 2003 Hi, I have had m GB out since last March of 2002. I tried not to have it out, but I found out my problem too late. The surgeon swore to me I would feel better after surgery and said I would be well. Well....not true at all! I never did trust the medical people, but I was in between a rock and a hard place. To make a long story short, I STILL have GB attack symptoms! My liver enzymes are sky high and they thought I had a liver stone. Well I had a sonogram and none showed. So now I just started a liver cleanse ( homeopathic ) and it is suppose to take one month to do. I am only 3 days into it, but still feel awful. I cannot eat beef or any fats or it will bring on an attack. Is anyone else going through this. Thank you for any help you can give me, Pearl (I feel so helpless over this!) Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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