Re: Request for help: HIV +e Wives of HIV negative- Husbands

[Guest guest]

Dear FORUM,

Re:

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12131 & p=0 & v=t%3D0

Majority of HIV infection transmission is from first husband to wife that time

we do not ask where did first husband got the infection?

We as counselor must help client to handle the post infection - Medically,

Psychologically, Socially and Economically without stressing to much on the

etiology of infection.

By being non-judgemental we can help the couple. But in our mind as care

provider if the question about source of HIV infection prevails then helping

can suffer.

Regards

Meenal

Meenal Mehta

E-MAIL: <Meenalmehta@...>

[Guest guest]

Dear ,

Re:

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Conselling and provision of prophylactic care and treatment to the discordant

couples form the biggest chanllenges to the service providers.

There is no dearth of case studies available with the ICTC/PPTCT counsellors and

ART centres where emphatetic,careful and sensitive way of service delivery has

brought about the desired results.

Best wishes,

R.Gopal.

Dr Rajesh Gopal

e-mail: <dr_rajeshg@...>

[Guest guest]

Dear Shri Manoharan,

Re:

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The situation you mentioned is called ' reverse transmission' as per

experts in this field.

ICTCs run by NACO in all states might be facing similar situations. More studies

are done across the country to understand the gravity of this situation.

If these women are identified positive from the ICTCs the counslors there will

be able to manage the situation as they are trained in these areas.

More over the drop in centres set up by the respective SACS for providing

support to PLHA and the state level networks for positives can help in this

regard.

There are some good posting in this forum regarding this topic. I would also

request you to go through these

Thanks and regards

Ajai

--

S.Ajai Kumar

Joint Director IEC

Kerala SACS

Red Cross Road

Thiruvananthapuram - 35

Kerala, India

[Guest guest]

Dear All, 

/messages#n=messages & c=message%2F\

12131 & p=0 & v=t%3D0

Haran asks what to do when a married woman tests HIV-positive during

antenatal care. That is an important question.

HIV tests during antenatal care is the way that a lot of HIV infections are

discovered. Finding an HIV infection is a sad and disruptive event, but it also

offers an opportunity to protect not only the unborn child but also the husband,

if he is not infected, and also to treat the wife and husband, if he

is infected.

 

So, what to do?

 

The problem is not, as Dr Haran's question suggests, a small one that can be

blamed on sex with former husbands.

There are several hundred thousand HIV-positive married women with

HIV-negative husbands.

How many of those women were formerly married, and the former husband was known

to be HIV-positive? Probably not many.

For years, the AIDS industry has paid for messages about sex, sex, sex -- so

that is all anyone has heard. 

 

If we can't get away from talking only about sex, what chance do we give women

who test HIV-positive? They're supposed to go to their husbands and tell them

they are HIV-positive, and ask the husband to go for a test?

The wives are traumatized, with an unexpected infection. At a time when they

should be happy, with a child on the way, they are hit with a disaster. And the

whole world is pointing fingers and doing their best -- with hundreds of

millions of dollars in foreign aid money topped up by money from Gates and

NACO -- to stigmatize them.

Who are we to advise a woman to tell her husband that she is infected, when he

may throw her out of the house? After all, for many years, all the messages he's

heard about HIV have linked it to sexual misbehavior.

Should we give up and say, OK, don't tell? That puts everyone at risk. Makes

treatment more difficult. Makes it more difficult to protect the unborn baby.

So, let's straighten out our messages first.

Let's be clear- an HIV infection is not a reliable sign of sexual behavior. A

lot of HIV -- how much we don't know -- comes from " innocent "

blood exposures, medical injections, dental care, tattooing, etc.

Let's make sure that message is delivered to the public, so the public gets a

balanced view of what HIV is about. And let's make sure that message is

delivered during counselling. Not the sex focus in current counselling. 

We recommend telling the woman that there are many ways she might have gotten

infected -- from dental care, an operation, an injection, tattoo, etc -- if she

was exposed to someone's blood.

Sex is only one of the options. Give her a leaflet that says the same thing -

that she can show to her husband if she is bold enough to talk to him about her

infection, so he does not right away think SEX SEX SEX.

And when he comes for a test, make sure that the counsellor says the same thing

-- that an HIV infection -- his and/or his wife's - might have come from blood

exposures. That he should not assume everything is from sex.

To make sure this sticks, counsellors have to be trained appropriately, so that

they are careful to give people information about all risks, and try to help

people who are traumatized and upset not to draw unwarranted conclusions about

how they or their spouse might have gotten infected.

 

Let's, in other words, be ready to blame a few doctors for bad behaviour. It

would help to clear the air, remove stigma, and slow this epidemic.

Is this too much to hope for? Will 25 of the next 26 messages to AIDS-India be

about HIV from sex? Hard to stop a good story, even when it's wrong and

dangerous and hurtful.

As long as the AIDS industry and all it's assistants can't stop indulging in

sexual fantasies and moralistic interpretations of disease, we are going to fail

to give women the kind of support that they and their families need when she

tests HIV-positive in antenatal care.

Gisselquist

Mariette Correa

e-mail: <david_gisselquist@...>

[Guest guest]

Dear All,

Re:

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P. Manoharan has a a vital question which has,probably, no straight answer.

There are inherent problems to answering the vital question. Instead of going

into too much of detail I will have few submissions as under:-

1. Firstly the couple is a discordant one (one of the spouse infected

other not infected).

2. How to disclose the HIV status in the case of discordant couples and later

counseling the couple/spouse is a highly skilled task.

3. It is very very important, rather a vital issue, that the uninfected

partner is protected from acquiring infection.

4. It is irrelevant and unimportant to discuss with the couple how the infected

partner acquired the infection. Thats part of the counseling process that

infection is not acquired exclusively through sex. So every effort is made to

protect the matrimonial relationship.

5. Its imperative to have an experienced counselor in such situations to provide

effective disclosure and couple counseling.

I think these issues need to be taken into consideration and we can come to some

acceptable solutions though not in all circumstances.

Thats why its not just a disease - its a complex psychosocial and economic

issue.

Regards to you all.

Dr. Balraj Singh.

M.D. (Community Medicine),

M.A.E. ( Epidemiology),

PGCC (Nutrition),

Epidemiologist-cum-Assistant Professor,

Indira Gandhi Medical College,

Shimla, Himachal Pradesh.

drbalraj@...

[Guest guest]

Dear and the FORUM,

Re:

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12131 & p=0 & v=t%3D0

I am re-posting one of my earlier postings--may be it has some clue

At Bharti Derma Care Center, Amritsar, I have quite a few such examples--

1.L, an HIV widow married his brother's HIV negative servant after n number of

counseling sessions for both four years ago--following the counseled way of

protection,they are as happy as any other four year married couple. Waiting for

the success of science to eliminate virus from wife,M ,is not spoiling his

today--they are both enjoying it.

2. V, married his fiancée without informing his own HIV status, whencompelled

to have a baby after one year, he followed the route of assisted reproduction

and is a father of HIV negative son today.

Today the wife also knows his status but is content with one son and happy to be

in his company without asking for more

3. This lady medical representative divorced by first husband was forced by an

HIV positive person on grounds of love to marry--no amount of counsel could

deter them from their determination to be one and today in first year of their

married life,they are a happy couple.

4. This dental surgeon (lady) was accepted by her veterinary surgeonbridegroom

despite her HIV status, the couple moved to Canada, has a HIV positive daughter

and a HIV negative son after seven years or so of marriage. The husband is still

negative.

5. R,the lady lecturer became a HIV widow with a HIV positive son. One of her

widower relation married her,so that he and his three sons do not die of hunger

and she gets a place to live/die on the condition that HIV positive son will not

come to live with the new family. The son is taken care off by maternal grand

parents and the couple is into sixth year of their marriage.

I can go on narrating more real life stories, but the question raised by Mr.

Shaligram remains unanswered till we look at the whole situation from various

angles.We have to understand why some one wants to marry--the institution

ofmarriage-- There can be no quick fix solutions to human problems surrounded by

diseases like HIV--the answers ought to be custom made.

Every situation has different angle and we have to understand all theangles.Our

experience clearly tells us that despite isolation of worst nature in cases of

leprosy, we have seen lepers marrying each other after being abandoned by the

society.

I am of firm belief that we should not allow today's HIV victims become like

lepers of tomorrow--we have to learn from past.

Marriage is good, should be allowed--but not child marriage(as in the case

presented by Mr.Shaligram) only after fullest counselling and ensuring happiness

of future,ensuring that misery will stop surrounding such needy persons(today n

number of HIV people approach us for finding partners, success of

positivesaathi.com is a proof).

We must accept the challenges thrown after the survival of HIV disease and will

have to look beyond just saving lives or preventing death--we have to give them

life--scientists will have to work hard in this direction.

Dr.Rakesh Bharti,

Bharti Derma Care and Research center,

27-D,Sant Avenue,The Mall,

Amritsar143001,Punjab INDIA

Email-rakesh.bharti1@...

9814044213 / 01832277822 /01832278522

[Guest guest]

Dear Forum,

Issue of HIV+ widow is really very serious and i feel we needed a HIV positve

marriage bureuo state-wise as soon as possible.

I know so many Male-Female PLHIV are facing marriage/re-marriage problem.It's

our and NACO duty to advice and guide them and reduce HIV nationally.

I advice to all PLHIV Keep intouch with your SLN-DLN and DIC's and share your

issues-problems in support group meetings.

I hope they help-counssel-reffer you to the right place.

Regards

Hari Singh

National GIPA Coordinator

Indian Network for People Living with HIV/AIDS

Executive Board Member Dnp+

skype id- hari.singh963

Emailid- hari@.../www.inpplus.net

G-46, First Floor, Green Park Main,New Delhi-16

Mob:+91 9891263535,Ph:011- 4265771, 73