Guest guest Posted December 31, 2005 Report Share Posted December 31, 2005 I don't know why your rheumy seemed a bit unsettled. It could have been because of your husband or any number of other reasons. All of us are a bit unsettled at times. My wife has been to many of my appointments with me and usually she is quiet and it doesn't seem to change the doctor's treatment of me at all. I encourage the spouse to go along whenever they want to, and sometimes I recommend trying to get them to go. God bless. ----- Original Message ----- From: snowdrift52003 Rheumatoid Arthritis Sent: Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:24 AM Subject: Bring hubby along? I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion(s) that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild-mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went with me to see her.Sierra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 31, 2005 Report Share Posted December 31, 2005 Sierra, I would take huby along. At least he can listen and help take notes. Two pairs of ears of better than one. Sometimes we don't hear all that is being said to us. This is an emotionally charged situation for you because its your body. I would bring him. Let the doc know he is interested in learning more about your disease, treatment and prognosis. He may also have questions that you have not thought of that he can ask while he is there. I do feel if she still does not want to do anything about these erosions and you feel that you are not getting the treatment that you need...I would change docs. Toni > > I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion(s) > that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My > husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's > come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a > little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and > coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your > thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild- > mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went > with me to see her. > > Sierra > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 31, 2005 Report Share Posted December 31, 2005 Sierra I don't think your rheumatologist should feel " unsettled " because you bring your spouse along. I took my husband with me one time, didn't bother the rheumatologist at all. I think it's a great idea because then you have 2 people remembering what was said and also your husband gets a better idea of what's going on with you..........He hears first hand any limitations put on you by the doctor and this makes it somewhat more believable. Also, if there is something important you forget to mention your husband might remind you.......all in all I think it's best you take someone. I always went with my father to his appointments to any doctor as he got older because then I could tell mom more clearly than dad could what was going on. His doctor's never minded. Dorey www.LivingWithRheumatoidArthritis.com ----- Original Message ----- From: " snowdrift52003 " <snowdrift52003@...> <Rheumatoid Arthritis > Sent: Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:24 AM Subject: Bring hubby along? > I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion(s) > that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My > husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's > come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a > little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and > coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your > thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild- > mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went > with me to see her. > > Sierra > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 1, 2006 Report Share Posted January 1, 2006 I think it's a great idea for your husband to go with you to your appointment. My fiancee has gone with me and he brought u some issues I would not have remembered. He wanted to know if my vision and clumsiness had something to do with my meds. He is also very concerned about my pain management. I think it is great to have your husband participate in your doctors visits and with this ugly disease. Rhonda Dorey <ddorey@...> wrote: Sierra I don't think your rheumatologist should feel "unsettled" because you bring your spouse along. I took my husband with me one time, didn't bother the rheumatologist at all. I think it's a great idea because then you have 2 people remembering what was said and also your husband gets a better idea of what's going on with you..........He hears first hand any limitations put on you by the doctor and this makes it somewhat more believable. Also, if there is something important you forget to mention your husband might remind you.......all in all I think it's best you take someone. I always went with my father to his appointments to any doctor as he got older because then I could tell mom more clearly than dad could what was going on. His doctor's never minded. Doreywww.LivingWithRheumatoidArthritis.com----- Original Message ----- From: "snowdrift52003" <snowdrift52003@...><Rheumatoid Arthritis >Sent: Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:24 AMSubject: Bring hubby along?> I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion(s)> that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My> husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's> come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a> little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and> coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your> thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild-> mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went> with me to see her.>> Sierra>>>>>>>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 1, 2006 Report Share Posted January 1, 2006 If you feel you want to tale your husband with you, do so. I have taken my sister with me to several different appointments. when I have been very ill. I wanted to make sure someone understood what was s going on. Also, re,remember you are paying the doc, not vice-versa in WIHarold Van Tuyl <hvantuyl@...> wrote: I don't know why your rheumy seemed a bit unsettled. It could have been because of your husband or any number of other reasons. All of us are a bit unsettled at times. My wife has been to many of my appointments with me and usually she is quiet and it doesn't seem to change the doctor's treatment of me at all. I encourage the spouse to go along whenever they want to, and sometimes I recommend trying to get them to go. God bless. ----- Original Message ----- From: snowdrift52003 Rheumatoid Arthritis Sent: Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:24 AM Subject: Bring hubby along? I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion(s) that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild-mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went with me to see her.Sierra for Good - Make a difference this year. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 1, 2006 Report Share Posted January 1, 2006 Thanks ! Sierra > > Sierra I don't think your rheumatologist should feel " unsettled " because you > bring your spouse along. I took my husband with me one time, didn't bother > the rheumatologist at all. I think it's a great idea because then you have > 2 people remembering what was said and also your husband gets a better idea > of what's going on with you..........He hears first hand any limitations put > on you by the doctor and this makes it somewhat more believable. Also, if > there is something important you forget to mention your husband might remind > you.......all in all I think it's best you take someone. I always went with > my father to his appointments to any doctor as he got older because then I > could tell mom more clearly than dad could what was going on. His doctor's > never minded. > > Dorey > www.LivingWithRheumatoidArthritis.com > ----- Original Message ----- > From: " snowdrift52003 " <snowdrift52003@y...> > <Rheumatoid Arthritis > > Sent: Saturday, December 31, 2005 11:24 AM > Subject: Bring hubby along? > > > > I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion (s) > > that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My > > husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's > > come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a > > little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and > > coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your > > thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild- > > mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went > > with me to see her. > > > > Sierra > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 2, 2006 Report Share Posted January 2, 2006 Hi everyone, This is Steph in VA & I thought I'd add my 2 cents. I do not know why your rheumy would be unsetlled with your hubby in the room either. Throughout my 6 years of having arthritis, I brought a number of people into the room with me -- my best friend when I was 1st dx'd, my parents when I moved home to recuperate so the rheumy could explain RA & the meds, my 1st roomie after being dx'd and now my fiancee. Like others have said, my 1st roomie & now my fiancee have noticed things I have done that they have brought to my rheumy (or reminded me to bring up). Before I brought my fiancee to my rheumy for the first time I asked my rheumy if it was okay. He said "of course not). My rheumy used his models to show Chad, my fiancee, how RA affects the body. It was very productive and Chad feels comfortable asking me or my rheumy questions. Sorry for the ramble! I wish all of you a pain free new year. Being a part of this group has been a true blessing for me. Take care, Steph ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ I'm planning to see my rheumy on Thursday to discuss the erosion(s) that my recent X-rays revealed and to discuss treatment options. My husband offered to go along. I have mixed feelings about that. He's come with me before and I've appreciated it, but this time it feels a little different. I want to avoid a power struggle with my rheumy, and coming in another person might make her uncomfortable. What are your thoughts about taking a spouse to appointments? Mine is gentle and mild-mannered but the rheumy seemed a bit unsettled the other time he went with me to see her.Sierra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 2, 2006 Report Share Posted January 2, 2006 This group has been a blessing for me, too. Before posting my hubby question, I was leaning towards having him stay home; now, after the unanimous " bring him " response, I'm bringin' him! Sometimes we have blind spots, and others can see and reflect back our situations more clearly. I value that highly. It's so convenient to " meet " this way, too! Sierra Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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