Re: OT- help with my other 2 children

[Guest guest]

I know what you are going through. We have a 17-year-old son NT, a 10-year-old

son ASD, and a 4 1/2-year-old daughter (not officially diagnosed ASD). My

17-year-old shows absolutely no attention to the other two (It use to not be

this way. Only in the past couple of years and he will not tell us what is

wrong). Does not acknowledge either of them unless he bumps into them. He cannot

wait to graduate and move out in 4 months. It is heartbreaking. The only groups

that were offered around here (I live in PA) a few years ago were if you had a

family member with mental health issues and our local ARC sent a survey and was

suppose to start a support group but never did. Maybe you could call your local

ARC chapter and see if they have a support group or if they could give you some

leads.

Hope this helps.

>

> I have a 13 year old nt son. He was 4 1/2 years old when I had my second

child- my, now, almost 9 year old severely asd son, . Up until then, he was

the only child- got all the attention, and he was little, so nothing was

expected of him. When was born, he was a VERY difficult baby, and has been

a lot of work his whole life- lots of attention ws taken away from my oldest.

The problem- 2 years later, I had my daughter, now just turned 7 years old, nt.

More attention taken away from my oldest- and more responsibility put on him, he

is older.

> He hates my daughter- always has- I think he blames her for his loss of

attention and more responsibilities- and sees her getting to be little, which is

how he wants to be.

> My daughter has always felt hate from him and hates him. I don't want the two

of them hating each other their whole lives. I have tried everything I can think

of- there is no reasoning with my oldest.

> I don't know what to do- or if there is a group or website I can go on- I am

hoping there is someone who can give me some info.

> I have thought of councilling- expensive.

> Any ideas?

> Thanks.

>

[Guest guest]

Mine is only 13- and it's funny hearing you say that- he's been saying for a

couple of years now that he can't wait to turn 18 so he can move out. We ask

him what he intends to do and how he intends to support himself- he says

he's going to get a job.

I live in Canada- in Alberta- I've never heard of ARC- what does that stand

for?

On Sat, Feb 13, 2010 at 8:19 PM, threekidsandapig <

threekidsandapig@...> wrote:

>

>

> I know what you are going through. We have a 17-year-old son NT, a

> 10-year-old son ASD, and a 4 1/2-year-old daughter (not officially diagnosed

> ASD). My 17-year-old shows absolutely no attention to the other two (It use

> to not be this way. Only in the past couple of years and he will not tell us

> what is wrong). Does not acknowledge either of them unless he bumps into

> them. He cannot wait to graduate and move out in 4 months. It is

> heartbreaking. The only groups that were offered around here (I live in PA)

> a few years ago were if you had a family member with mental health issues

> and our local ARC sent a survey and was suppose to start a support group but

> never did. Maybe you could call your local ARC chapter and see if they have

> a support group or if they could give you some leads.

>

> Hope this helps.

>

>

>

>

>

> >

> > I have a 13 year old nt son. He was 4 1/2 years old when I had my second

> child- my, now, almost 9 year old severely asd son, . Up until then, he

> was the only child- got all the attention, and he was little, so nothing was

> expected of him. When was born, he was a VERY difficult baby, and has

> been a lot of work his whole life- lots of attention ws taken away from my

> oldest. The problem- 2 years later, I had my daughter, now just turned 7

> years old, nt. More attention taken away from my oldest- and more

> responsibility put on him, he is older.

> > He hates my daughter- always has- I think he blames her for his loss of

> attention and more responsibilities- and sees her getting to be little,

> which is how he wants to be.

> > My daughter has always felt hate from him and hates him. I don't want the

> two of them hating each other their whole lives. I have tried everything I

> can think of- there is no reasoning with my oldest.

> > I don't know what to do- or if there is a group or website I can go on- I

> am hoping there is someone who can give me some info.

> > I have thought of councilling- expensive.

> > Any ideas?

> > Thanks.

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Not sure what ARC stands for. Here is the website:

www.thearc.org

My son will not tell me what he is going to do when he moves out. I think he is

trying to punish us in his way. He started telling us a year ago he couldn't

wait to move out and after many tears on my end I have kind of accepted it. Wish

we could have a better relationship before he does move out but I can only do

what I can do. I just keep praying for him and hoping he eventually comes

around. My parents live in Virginia and I am thinking he is planning on living

with them (they want him to).

Take care.

> > >

> > > I have a 13 year old nt son. He was 4 1/2 years old when I had my second

> > child- my, now, almost 9 year old severely asd son, . Up until then, he

> > was the only child- got all the attention, and he was little, so nothing was

> > expected of him. When was born, he was a VERY difficult baby, and has

> > been a lot of work his whole life- lots of attention ws taken away from my

> > oldest. The problem- 2 years later, I had my daughter, now just turned 7

> > years old, nt. More attention taken away from my oldest- and more

> > responsibility put on him, he is older.

> > > He hates my daughter- always has- I think he blames her for his loss of

> > attention and more responsibilities- and sees her getting to be little,

> > which is how he wants to be.

> > > My daughter has always felt hate from him and hates him. I don't want the

> > two of them hating each other their whole lives. I have tried everything I

> > can think of- there is no reasoning with my oldest.

> > > I don't know what to do- or if there is a group or website I can go on- I

> > am hoping there is someone who can give me some info.

> > > I have thought of councilling- expensive.

> > > Any ideas?

> > > Thanks.

> > >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

A TSS told me that in PA, if there is family counseling needed due to ASD dx, it

has to be covered either by insurance or ACCESS. I don't know if this is true,

and if it is, I'd be willing to bet they want that kept quiet. Ask your

wraparound service provider.

> >

> > I have a 13 year old nt son. He was 4 1/2 years old when I had my second

child- my, now, almost 9 year old severely asd son, . Up until then, he was

the only child- got all the attention, and he was little, so nothing was

expected of him. When was born, he was a VERY difficult baby, and has been

a lot of work his whole life- lots of attention ws taken away from my oldest.

The problem- 2 years later, I had my daughter, now just turned 7 years old, nt.

More attention taken away from my oldest- and more responsibility put on him, he

is older.

> > He hates my daughter- always has- I think he blames her for his loss of

attention and more responsibilities- and sees her getting to be little, which is

how he wants to be.

> > My daughter has always felt hate from him and hates him. I don't want the

two of them hating each other their whole lives. I have tried everything I can

think of- there is no reasoning with my oldest.

> > I don't know what to do- or if there is a group or website I can go on- I am

hoping there is someone who can give me some info.

> > I have thought of councilling- expensive.

> > Any ideas?

> > Thanks.

> >

>

[Guest guest]

I did not know that. My 10-year-old was discharged over 2 years ago. They told

me there was nothing else they could do for him even though he is extremely self

injurious. So currently we do not have wraparound services. He does have a case

worker through MH/MR so I will see if she knows anything. My 17-year-old told me

if we do counseling he will not talk to anyone so I don't know if that will

help.

Thanks!

> > >

> > > I have a 13 year old nt son. He was 4 1/2 years old when I had my second

child- my, now, almost 9 year old severely asd son, . Up until then, he was

the only child- got all the attention, and he was little, so nothing was

expected of him. When was born, he was a VERY difficult baby, and has been

a lot of work his whole life- lots of attention ws taken away from my oldest.

The problem- 2 years later, I had my daughter, now just turned 7 years old, nt.

More attention taken away from my oldest- and more responsibility put on him, he

is older.

> > > He hates my daughter- always has- I think he blames her for his loss of

attention and more responsibilities- and sees her getting to be little, which is

how he wants to be.

> > > My daughter has always felt hate from him and hates him. I don't want the

two of them hating each other their whole lives. I have tried everything I can

think of- there is no reasoning with my oldest.

> > > I don't know what to do- or if there is a group or website I can go on- I

am hoping there is someone who can give me some info.

> > > I have thought of councilling- expensive.

> > > Any ideas?

> > > Thanks.

> > >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

Have any of you checked into sibshops?

LInda S S

Re: OT- help with my other 2 children

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