Urgent Healing and Prayer Requst -- I'm Really Struggling

[Guest guest]

Beloved Soul Family:

Dear Hearts, my most beautiful and beloved soul family. I'm going through an extremely rough time lately and am really feeling the need to reach out tonight. As most of you already know and some of you may not I'm 29 yrs old now, and I had been verbally and emotionally abused by me ex-stepfather (who is an Alcholic) for about 8 yrs from when I was 13 until I was about 21 yrs. old. I've been going to Alanon and also Coda for a little over a year now.

Things were just much to painful for me and so I had of course blocked it all out, and have only just started remember and working through things about 2 yrs ago with the help of my therapist as well as no going to Alanon and Coda. I know in the back of my mind that I'm Worthy and Loved and Valued and that It's Not My Fault, but at the same time the feelings of feeling unworthy and unloved and unvalued and feeling like it's my fault, etc are so completely overpowering that it makes me forget the real truth. Also my mother has never been there for me emotinally and still isn't, so most likely never will be. Sometime I just hurt so much that I wish there was never such a thing as feelings. Right now I just need so very much to be held and comforted or even just a great big hug,but have no one here at home to do that. Even as I sit here at the computer typing this I feel like I'm about to burst into tears at any second, and I can feel eve!

rything welling up inside of me and can feel the tears starting to run down my cheeks.

Also I suffer from Depression and (SAD) Seasonal Affective Disorder and the meds that I'm currently on have completely stopped working so I'm in the process of med change though can't start the new meds yet as I'm have to be weened off the old ones first. Also just recently I lost another very dear friend and and I had gone to the funeral which was on Tuesday. Also back in early December had lost another very dear friend who was only 21 yrs old. He had been killed pretty much instantly in a tragic highway accident. I miss him so very much and love him as if he were the brother I never had. I'm very close to him and his whole family. So right now I'm in the process of grieving as well, and am no were near being done grieving for my dear brother that was killed back in December and now I have another loss to deal with on top on that. So right now I'm also in the middle of so!

me very severe mental tests and could really use of super extra heavy duty prayers especially for healing and for aid and assistance and/or tests and difficulties. Also prayers for the departed would be very much appreciated as well.

Hope this isn't too long, Thanks everyone for letting me vent and of course also thanks so much for listening it's most truly appreciated. Much love and blessings to all.

Love Always,

Your Beloved Soul Sister Lara

Tolland,CT USA

"Be a lamp or a lifeboat or a ladder. Help someone's soul heal. Walk out of your house like a shepherd." ~ Rumi

"Faith is the bird that feels the light when the dawn is still dark."

Rabindranath Tagore