Guest guest Posted January 13, 2011 Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 Beth, You sound like me, my kids father , same story, although i did get a $2.00 check occassionally, i think it was making liscense plates in jail IDK. He can draw ssi based on being a drug addict, depression, and since he now has low income he doesnt have to pay the prior 50,000 + that he owes accum. since 1979. Now maybe he is unable to work for whatever reason, I am currently laid off, not working for the first time in my life in 35 years, i have paid my taxes, his and then some, I worked during tx also and it wasnt easy. Why is it now that I need a little help, "I am just about 50.00 a month too much" from any medical care or anything.I dont get it either. I cant compare myself to him though because it can make me an angry person. I quess alll in life isnt fair, but i am optimistic I will find another job, being older and sick doesn't help my chances though. I will be forced to work sick, like it or not, or become homeless. I just pray I find the strength. Man even a portion of that 50k would be helpfull. dagnabit Ill never seee it either. Betty From: Beth Frey <bethfrey42301@...> Sent: Thu, January 13, 2011 1:29:40 PMSubject: Re: [ ] Venting Just need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 13, 2011 Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 I am right here with you on this one Beth. Makes me crazy. My ex is a deadbeat of a different kind but he is drawing SSD and has been for most of the past 30 years or so. He is on SSD for all the right reasons, but he's still a jerk. He had 3 kids from a previous marriage when I met him and he hardly ever saw those kids... he did pay child support though. When he wound up on SSD the mother of those kids got a check for each of them every month. More than her child support was so he stopped paying child support. He and I have a child together. My son is 30 and has not talked to his father in a good 3 years. See, his father only has room for one of his kids in his life at a time. Right now he is focusing on his first born son. One of his daughters died 2 years ago from alcoholism. She was 39 years old. Didn't phase him a bit. There was a time when heroin addiction would get you SSD benefits. I knew people drawing SSD because of this. That check would come in on the 3rd of the month and by the 4th, all that money would be shot up their arms. Made me ill just thinking about it. I know they have cracked down on that and you can't get SSD for that anymore. I am surprised, however, that you can get SSI. I think you should have to take routine drug tests to be getting assistance from the government. Hell, we have to take them to get a job. Have you tried to apply for SSD? Might be something you can get?I know this is frustrating.. hang in there kiddo... it's going to be okay. And it's not worth your energy to get riled up over it. Some people are just not right. Hugs,TeriOn Thu, Jan 13, 2011 at 12:29 PM, Beth Frey <bethfrey42301@...> wrote: Just need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........ You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 13, 2011 Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 Oh BethI get just what you are saying!!! Unfortunately, I have a very poor past when it comes to men in my life. One thing you need to do, is give yourself a big pat on the back for having the perseverance to raise two children alone. Do those kids have any babies of their own?? Then, just think! The man still isn't looking after himself, he has to live with Mommy... For most men that would be the lowest of lows. If he doesn't see it that way, put on your best smirk whenever he's around. He'll have to try to figure out what you know that he doesn't.Hell, what you have that he doesn't, is your pride and integrity!! That's no small thing either.GloriaJust need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 13, 2011 Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 Geez - sounds like I'm far from the only one that picked the wrong ones!!!My 1st husband is still in prison for the murder of his 4th wife!!! It was horrible because the only part of her body that was found was her head... I was wife #2 and only lasted 18 months. When the RCMP came to talk to me about it, that really handsome young cop dropped his jaw when I said that he wasn't even the worst of my ex's. It's quite likely that man #2 gave me the HepC!!But, 20+ years have past and I just can't let myself think of any of it. Even the husband that just passed away, has left me with a mess to clean up.Gloria Beth, You sound like me, my kids father , same story, although i did get a $2.00 check occassionally, i think it was making liscense plates in jail IDK. He can draw ssi based on being a drug addict, depression, and since he now has low income he doesnt have to pay the prior 50,000 + that he owes accum. since 1979. Now maybe he is unable to work for whatever reason, I am currently laid off, not working for the first time in my life in 35 years, i have paid my taxes, his and then some, I worked during tx also and it wasnt easy. Why is it now that I need a little help, "I am just about 50.00 a month too much" from any medical care or anything.I dont get it either. I cant compare myself to him though because it can make me an angry person. I quess alll in life isnt fair, but i am optimistic I will find another job, being older and sick doesn't help my chances though. I will be forced to work sick, like it or not, or become homeless. I just pray I find the strength. Man even a portion of that 50k would be helpfull. dagnabit Ill never seee it either. Betty From: Beth Frey <bethfrey42301@...> Sent: Thu, January 13, 2011 1:29:40 PMSubject: Re: [ ] Venting Just need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 13, 2011 Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 TeriI agree with you!!! We have what is called "Welfare Wednesday" here. That means single moms, drug addicts, alcoholics, just plain lazy - get their dole on the second to last Wednesday of the month. Guess who they pick on the most?? Yup - the poor single mother that can't get those deadbeat dads to pay anything. We even have an agency that will chase around and find those dad's - sometime! Of course, it is short staffed and so if the asshole pays one month and then not for the next 6 months, he won't be on the top of that list.Gloria I am right here with you on this one Beth. Makes me crazy. My ex is a deadbeat of a different kind but he is drawing SSD and has been for most of the past 30 years or so. He is on SSD for all the right reasons, but he's still a jerk. He had 3 kids from a previous marriage when I met him and he hardly ever saw those kids... he did pay child support though. When he wound up on SSD the mother of those kids got a check for each of them every month. More than her child support was so he stopped paying child support. He and I have a child together. My son is 30 and has not talked to his father in a good 3 years. See, his father only has room for one of his kids in his life at a time. Right now he is focusing on his first born son. One of his daughters died 2 years ago from alcoholism. She was 39 years old. Didn't phase him a bit. There was a time when heroin addiction would get you SSD benefits. I knew people drawing SSD because of this. That check would come in on the 3rd of the month and by the 4th, all that money would be shot up their arms. Made me ill just thinking about it. I know they have cracked down on that and you can't get SSD for that anymore. I am surprised, however, that you can get SSI. I think you should have to take routine drug tests to be getting assistance from the government. Hell, we have to take them to get a job. Have you tried to apply for SSD? Might be something you can get?I know this is frustrating.. hang in there kiddo... it's going to be okay. And it's not worth your energy to get riled up over it. Some people are just not right. Hugs,TeriOn Thu, Jan 13, 2011 at 12:29 PM, Beth Frey <bethfrey42301@...> wrote: Just need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........ You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 13, 2011 Report Share Posted January 13, 2011 BethI'll bet your kids don't live on the government? Because you worked to raise them, they were given the right values.I know of families here that are now 3rd generation on welfare!!! They see no reason why it should be any different. Now, I fell onto the system for awhile once and I can tell you, it was tearing my pride apart. My father would work two jobs, so that the family had their needs met. Also, my mother went to work when the youngest started school. My son does not remember that period of his life and knows nothing else except that I've worked, as did his step-father. He has that pride, integrity and principals; so, I am proud of him.GloriaJust need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 14, 2011 Report Share Posted January 14, 2011 This has gone on for 25 yrs. I got a letter for a court date of 2/15/11 requesting the court to waive any and all support owed. That was salt in a wound so I will be there. Know there is nothing I can do since it is SSI because he never worked enough to draw SSD. Next time he comes into the water office I am going to tell the sperm donor not to let his mom pay her own bill in the future. Just need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 14, 2011 Report Share Posted January 14, 2011 You are so right my girls are go getters. You are so kind to respond with so much going on in your life right now. Just know you and your family are in my constant prayer. May the Lord smile on you and your family and give you the comfort and peace you are seeking. From: Gloria <gadamscan@...>Subject: Re: [ ] Venting Date: Thursday, January 13, 2011, 11:57 PM BethI'll bet your kids don't live on the government? Because you worked to raise them, they were given the right values.I know of families here that are now 3rd generation on welfare!!! They see no reason why it should be any different. Now, I fell onto the system for awhile once and I can tell you, it was tearing my pride apart. My father would work two jobs, so that the family had their needs met. Also, my mother went to work when the youngest started school. My son does not remember that period of his life and knows nothing else except that I've worked, as did his step-father. He has that pride, integrity and principals; so, I am proud of him.Gloria Just need to vent a little and am not sure how some of you will take this but here I go........ My exhusband is now drawing SSI cant draw SSD because no work history. So the state has decieded to waive any and all child support he owes. MY children are grown and gone and in their 30s and we have been divorced for over 25 yrs he has never paid a dime ( mostly because he was in jail for drugs or stealing). I have worked and supported these 2 children my whole life had to work while taking tx because I have no one to help me or support me. so he draws for being a professional crimal and I who am sick has to continue to work to support myself and his SSI. What the hell is wrong with this picture. What the hell is wrong with our governmentf? People ask how people can get pushed to the limit and kill others I can tell you how. Oh yes and let me add I just found this out this week (been a really bad week) but he has been drawing this money for a 1 1/2 yrs and comes into my work smiling and talking like all is well with the world (he is paying his mothers water bill -yes he lives with her). What an ASSHOLE knowing I am sick and having to work while he hangs out doing drugs and god only knows what else drawing my tax dollars!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Really still dont feel any better........You know it isnt about the money (knew I would never see it) it is the principal and gall. --- Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Recommended Posts
Join the conversation
You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.