Accepting others as they are

[Guest guest]

We see many problems in our relationships and between relationships of other

people because we all are failing to accept others as they are. Mostly, we all

people are looking for something special in others and when we fail in getting

these qualities in others then we try to change them. Here most of problems

start in life because every person in this world hates to change. However, some

people due to lack of their ability to see others point of views or their own

ego try everything to change others.

Now the other person who finds all these expectation of change very painful and

hurting; and he slowly decided to leave this relation. Some relationships breaks

peacefully while other break with big quarrels; however, main point is that

relationship breaks. These relationships may be any relationship like

husband-wife relationship, brother-sister relation, relationship between friends

etc. The main reason of fall of most of relationships in this world is

expectations of change from each other, however, on the other hand people who

learn to accept people as they are mostly have sound and healthy relationships

and their relationships last for long time.

It is very important to learn that any relationship does not provides a right to

us to govern or change others life. Moreover, few things which are helpful to us

may not be same way helpful to others.

Therefore, by asking changes in others we do a big crime of killing others

uniqueness. Healthy relationship does not mean relationship between two same

kinds of people but it means accepting each other for what they are then

criticizing them for what they are not.

Accepting others as they are without judgment is the fastest way to achieve

peace and harmony in your own life. When we unable to accept another for who

they are, or we pass judgment on them or their behavior, all we are actually

doing is rejecting ourselves and passing judgment on ourselves.

How accepting we are of others is a very good indication of how accepting we are

of ourselves. We see the world through our own biography, through our

experiences and it is only possible to see qualities in another that we possess

in ourselves. A child for example has no concept that someone might be lying

until they learn how to lie themselves. It's only once they have told a lie that

they understand others may also be lying also. In effect they become a victim of

their own crime.

The same is true with us. When we see a behavior we don't like, understand that

the behavior must be present in us somewhere for us to recognize it and be

bothered by it. Instead of getting upset, try silently thanking that person for

showing you that there is a part inside of you that you still need to work on.

Reminding yourself of a few other things can also help. Here are a few.

Their behavior is not conscious Most people are just doing as they have been

taught to do. They are running the psychological programs and patterns handed

down from family, school and society. The majority of people never stop to

question why they do what that do, they just run the program mindlessly.

They are just trying to meet their own needs This is all we are all trying to

do, everybody just goes about it a different way. It's not about you at all,

it's all about them and getting their needs met. You are doing exactly the same

thing, just in a different way.

Walk Away! If you don't agree then just walk away! We do not have to have

agreement to have harmony. Allow someone to do as they choose, just choose not

to be a part of it.

Take a look at yourself The only way you can pass judgment is to be in

possession of the correct idea or the correct standard. Open yourself up to the

possibility that you might be wrong or there might be more than one way, life

will get much easier for you.

God grant me the serenity

to accept the things I cannot change;

courage to change the things I can;

and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;

Enjoying one moment at a time;

Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;

Taking, as He did, this sinful world

as it is, not as I would have it;

Trusting that He will make all things right

if I surrender to His Will;

That I may be reasonably happy in this life

and supremely happy with Him

Forever in the next.

Amen.