New to group/finally introducing my family

December 18, 2008

Hello everyone,

I'm , and I joined this group a few weeks back to gain a better

understand and maybe some support for my husband's pain.

I don't know the exact location (L's or C's, etc) but he does have

herniated discs in his lower back, as well as pinched nerves, herniated

discs and arthritis in his neck. He's in constant pain, as I know you

all can relate to. His pain has been steadily progressing over the past

10 years (started out w/ scoliosis in his back causing pain) of our

marriage.

We've done all of the following: years of chiropractic, multiple

cortisone injections, 2 rounds of physical therapy, spinal

decompression, acupuncture and now it's the pain meds (oxycontin,

gabapentin, trazodone).

He asked his doc the other week about upping his pain meds as the oxy's

not working. In fact, he doesn't think it ever did. However, the doc

said he'd have to refer him out to a Pain Clinic for that, as he wasn't

able to prescribe anything stronger.

His actual " back " doctor said to " give him call " whenever he's ready to

schedule spinal fusion in his neck. The doc said they'd have to

remove/fuse 3 discs.

The idea of surgery is terrifying for my husband, as he's heard horror

stories about it. From not being able to turn your head all the way

anymore, to having it just flat-out not work, leaving you in more pain

than before.

His pain is effecting all areas of his life; although he still works

(for a company that provides sub-contracting work for Boeing) as a

supervisor, his boss asks almost daily if there's anything wrong. Dean

is very depressed by his pain, and I wish there was something more I

could do to help besides rubbing his neck/back/shoulder/leg.

He's not as active with our 3 children as he used to be, and when he's

home he's quite short w/ them. I realize that he's in a tremendous

amount of pain--pain which I cannot even begin to understand. But I know

it hurts them, as well as my husband. Our marriage is also suffering

due to his depression over all this. He often says I " deserve a better

man " than him. And that hurts.

I don't know what sort of reply I'm looking for. I guess I just needed

to introduce myself a bit and let all of you know that I am deeply sorry

for all your pain. Watching my husband go through this has been one of

the hardest things in my life, and I pray that you all find relief.

Sincerely,

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